the writing and photography of Neil Kramer

The Wider That Her Hips Are


Have you seen this interesting health news? — Research shows that women with bigger hips have higher IQs than their more slender counterparts. Finally! A way to figure out which readers to dump from my blogroll — the dumb skinny ones. (sorry, size 0 Communicatrix — you just can’t argue with science)

The Wider That Her Hips Are

The wider that her hips are
The higher her IQ
Deena has a nice big ass
So she’s the girl I woo

Mira Sorvino, she’s hourglass
She went to Harvard, did well in class
Keira Knightley, she has no tit
So naturally, she’s as dumb as shit

The wider that her hips are
The higher her IQ
Deena has a nice big ass
So she’s the girl I woo

Her curvy waist, her ample hips
She rides me for an hour
I love the way she conjugates
With all her brainy-power

The wider that her hips are
The higher her IQ
Deena has a nice big ass
So she’s the girl I woo.


  1. buzzgirl

    Then I must be a freakin’ genius.

  2. CuriosityKiller

    I’m suddenly so proud of my big ass. Thanks man.

  3. Artful Kisser

    I’m a 62 – 5 points brainier than J-Lo. Yep…who knew my brain was in my arse?

  4. Kathy

    (Me and my boy butt slink away..)

  5. Alissa

    I really want to buy the woman in the picture some new underpants.

  6. Aimee Greeblemonkey

    Sweet. I am in like Flynn.

  7. Finn


  8. kristen

    small of tit and hip, baby got back so who needs brains?

  9. tiddleywink

    Neil, I now officially love you. I needed that pick-up today! I am now about to put Fat Bottomed Girls on my turntable, and will crank up the bass. I wanna hear those bottom notes, you know!

  10. Ash

    Neil, my ass is loving you. And on my birthday too! Mwah!

  11. Walking Punchline

    Best news I’ve heard all day- fat bottom girls really do make the rockin’ world go round.

  12. Geeky Tai-Tai

    Well, I just posted my “genius” label on my blog, but I truly didn’t know it had anything to do with my “hippiness”.

    I’m liking these sexy posts! Keep it up (sorry, I couldn’t help myself)! Really, though, don’t stop posting this sort of creative post. I’m loving it!

  13. TRO

    A nice big ass is great as long as they have the hooters up front to balance it all out. What? Aren’t we telling the truth here?

  14. communicatrix

    Yes, exactly. Wait! I is offended! I be just as smart as fat-ass grrrl!

  15. Atomic Bombshell

    That album cover ROCKS!

  16. abbersnail

    Well, I must be a veritable Einstein!

    This was the best thing I’ve read all day. Thanks for that!

  17. aka_monty

    You’ve just saved me years in therapy for my low self-esteem due to my xtra wide ass. SO THANK YOU. 😉

  18. LetterB

    So it’s not just junk in my trunk? Phew.

  19. sassy

    THANK YOU Neil. I finally feel vindicated.

  20. Leesa

    Wow.. I must be really smart too.

  21. Karl

    Now I have a hankering for some Queen. I tend to like women with some thickness to them, but I’m not sure IQ correlates to ass size.

  22. MammaLoves

    I’ve considered having the study tattooed to my derriere.

  23. churlita

    Shit. I guess I’m dumb But I’m drinking whole milk so maybe one of these days I’ll become bigger and smarter than all of you…

  24. Loralee

    I am a big-boned girl with no ass.
    It makes me sad, but at least now it explains a lot! 😉

  25. E

    I is geeenious!!

    Seriously, thanks, Neil.

  26. Mrs. Chicky

    So that’s why I never got into that ivy league school. I blame my ass on my poor SAT scores.

  27. di

    Lordy, you’ll have a world of grateful women after you, you genius man, you.

    I will quote you, implying scientific journal source …

  28. Bec

    Yes Finally a reason to feel sorry for the skinny chicks. Envy me and my arse! Should the ‘hippy’ness become a further MENSA requirement?

  29. cruisin-mom

    Neil, you are genius…what a way to have all these women fall in love with you…telling them big butts are bootilicious and equate with intelligence…you’re brilliant (and transparent)

  30. Nina

    You can’t argue with science. It is not only delightful, but true.

    I have the ass and the IQ to illustrate the point. (And whoever said that about the boobs? I have plenty there, too).

  31. kenju

    Put me in your blogroll, then, I really deserve to be there!

  32. Rosa

    The next time anyone doubts my intelligence I will bend over and moon them on the spot. Of course it’s obvious that I’ve got a high IQ without the mooning and bending.

  33. 180/360

    Whatever! Just because there are loaves of bread bigger than my ass, it doesn’t make me any less smart. I took an online IQ test once and scored 139. Apparently, I’m an ass-less genius. 🙂

  34. better safe than sorry

    this seems more aerosmith than queen to me, maybe they need to cover this?

  35. Bonita in Pink

    My ass hurts now. I’m not a genius but I don’t think I’m that dumb either! LOL Loved the post.
    Sent here from “Oh my Stinkin’ Heck”


  36. Jenifer

    Finally, proof of my genius – from my hips to my brains.

  37. Ed the Gent

    I feel as though this vindicates my years of chasing women of corpulent musculature and ill repute.

  38. wendy

    Who’s Deena?

  39. RiceWenchie

    OMG, there is hope for me after all!!!! LOL :oD

  40. Janet

    You mean Jessica Alba isn’t a genius after all? I’m shocked!:)

  41. JanePoe (aka Deborah)

    Now there’s a research study I can get behind!

  42. Marie

    Being a size 2 with DD breasts and wide hips I have the best of both worlds.

    If you look at the study carefully you will see that the outcome has to do with more than just the size of the ass; it’s a ratio issue. The beneficial fats in the hips can be outweighed be detrimental fats in other areas of the body.

    Please keep in mind it’s not nice to pick on someone for their weight; whether overweight or under. Skinny people have feelings too.

  43. Nick

    DDs on a size 2 are still raisins. And no one is picking on anyone, well – at least Neil isn’t. 🙂 Maybe your plastic surgeon can implant some sense of humor?

  44. Not Fainthearted

    Wonderful news! Hip Hip Hooray! (heh)

    But I too, would like to buy her a new pair of panties.

  45. V-Grrrl

    “I love the way she conjugates with all her brainy power.”

    Ah, I love your sly humor. Very sexy.

  46. Paige Stanton

    That’s a big hell yeah for fat bottomed girls!

  47. Annie

    Well, my hips are narrow and I don’t have much of a bum, but I have never been called skinny, does that count? 🙂

  48. Audrey freak

    Hahahaha, that is so dumb. I’m a size zero and I do have an hourglass, so what about that? Or the fact that Mira Sorvino is thin? Or how Keira is not dumb? Or how an alarming amount of fat girls are dumb enough to pretend that curvy is the same as chubby/fat/obese/big-chested? It’s not. It’s having distinctive curves. Curves being, obviously, where your waist CURVES in. This is just another way for them to try to feel good about themselves and their insecurities in a bad way.

    inb4 rage

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