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Category Archives: Sex
The Shoulder
The shoulder is the Mason-Dixon line of a woman’s body. North and South. To the North are her wide eyes and the gentle face, as innocent as a child’s. To the South lies the lusty flesh that is only seen … Continue reading
The Importance of Sentence Structure in the “Date Question”
In some ways, I know less about “dating” now than I did in high school. I never dated in high school, so obviously, being young and stupid, I naturally assumed I understood it all. Now, after years of experience going … Continue reading
A Proof of the Existence of God
Many of you ask me about my religion, wondering if I truly adhere to the belief in an all powerful, all-knowing God. Here’s what I think: None of us can truly know if God exists, but anyone who admires nature, … Continue reading
A Master Class
Today is my mother’s birthday. This is her birthday card. It was a windy and lonely October evening. I was in my bedroom, the overhead lamp flickering, as I IM-ed with Allison, a New Hampshire woman who wrote a knitting … Continue reading
Change of Fantasy
Hi, dear reader. Today, I’d like to report a change in my typical male fantasy. You know, the one I have when I’m sitting in McDonald’s or the supermarket or the subway and think about sex. I have no idea … Continue reading
Feminists Ruin Everything
It’s one thing to have a woman run for President, or become a CEO, but enough is enough. It’s not fair. You keep on infringing on our territory, without giving us anywhere to go. You can wear a dress. You … Continue reading
What Would Jesus Rodriguez, Moralistic Web Developer Geek, Do?
Dear Jesus Rodriguez, Moralistic Web Developer Geek, I have a dilemma that only you can help me with. Last night, I was in the bed of a beautiful brunette. She had invited me there, eager for carnal pleasure. Our lips … Continue reading
The Planets Now Revolve Around Neptune
For the last four years, this blog has been all about my penis. I’ve written about my penis, given voice to my penis, posted drawings of my penis, and emailed photos of my penis to most of my female readers, … Continue reading
The Canasta Group of Boca Raton
My first observation when I moved into the retirement community at Century Village was the lack of men at the clubhouse. The ratio was 2-1. “Where are all the men?” I asked. “They’re dead,” said Rita, my blunt neighbor, a … Continue reading
Lap Dancing and Science
A few days ago, some blogger made a joke about lap dances on Twitter, and it occurred to me that, despite my encyclopedic knowledge of trivia, I didn’t have a clear idea of what happens during a lap dance. While … Continue reading