In some ways, I know less about “dating” now than I did in high school. I never dated in high school, so obviously, being young and stupid, I naturally assumed I understood it all. Now, after years of experience going bra-shopping with Sophia at Target and forgetting to buy flowers on Valentine’s Day, I understand the ramifications and complexities of every life decision, which can paralyze even the strongest of men.
This was my Facebook status update earlier —
“If you were a separated woman who lived on my block, and I asked you to go to the movies, would you assume that I am asking you out on a “date,” and what would you think are my “motivations?” Won’t this act forever change our current relationship? Why the hell am I asking YOU?”
I received several interesting responses. Thank you, Facebook “friends” — some of who I know absolutely nothing about, but love you anyway — for your honest responses. I wish I could go on a date with you. But frankly, I would be too worried that you would write about the disastrous date on your blog, so forget about it.
The Facebook response that intrigued me the most came from Marie Angell, a singer from Houston, who indicated that asking a woman out on a date is primarily — about language. As a writer, I love to think about the meaning of words. Writing is about words. Recently, I wrote a post that everything online is merely words.
So why can’t dating be seen as simple and controllable as being about words?!
This is what Marie wrote —
“Is this a date to you? If so, then you should say something along the lines of: I’d love to take you out–would you like to go to a movie on <date 3 days hence>.
If you just want to hang out as friends (for …now), you can say: I’m in the mood for a movie. How about you?”
So, in a nutshell, if a guy starts a sentence with “I’d love to…” he wants to get into the woman’s pants. But if he says, “I’m in the mood…” he is saying that he hasn’t seen “The King’s Speech” yet, but hates going to the movies by himself.
Now, it is all clear.