I apologize about the last two self-indulgent posts. But I like them. You have to remember, before I met Sophia, I was just some dorky guy who collected international postage stamps. Sophia taught me not to wear white socks with shoes. I taught her important TV trivia, such as how Vivian Vance and William Frawley didn’t get along very well during the taping of “I Love Lucy.”
Most importantly, women were demystified. I saw one buying a bra, having a period, kvetching over the wrong brand of Rocky Road ice cream. “Dreyers, not Breyers!” And I finally learned where my hands were supposed to go.
Then I started blogging and interacting with hot women from around the world. Is it really a surprise that every other post is about sex? I’m sorry. What can I do? If I just write stories, my blog is well-written, but superficial. But if I really dig down deep and write about what is weighing on my mind — oral sex — then, where is this post going…?
I think I’m ready to be re-introduced to the world.
Remember, this blog is about my mind. It is akin to therapy. I like Neilochka. I want to integrate this more interesting version of myself into reality. This Neilochka takes off his shirt on blog posts and makes women scream with pleasure. This is NOT the Neil who is afraid of putting advertising on his blog because then “people won’t like him.”
This Neilochka has confidence. He says what he thinks. So, if I haven’t been commenting on your blog lately, I’m not going to lie anymore and say I’ve been busy… boo hoo. It’s because your blog is BORING AS HELL and I get more bang for my buck by commenting on some big-name blogger or some chick who might give me some!
(You know that I’m only joking, right? I love you. Especially my male readers. You know where I’m coming from, right? I’m going to comment right now. Twice. Don’t hate me. Ever. I was just trying to be funny)
Damn. I’m never going to change. Luckily, my therapist, Brenda, gave me her phone number so I can call her from New York.