On my last post, Eekat asked a very important question in the comments:
What does it TAKE to become your crush of the day, anyway?
It occured to me that while I was blabbing on about my blogroll and ways to improve my relationships with my blogging-pals, I never fully explained how my “crush of the day” works. I would love to explain the complicated mathematical formula —
comments x 3+posts/x-Blogger+%blinking banners-y/words in comment+/-profile photo = crush of the day
— but it is probably over most bloggers’ heads, so I won’t get into the details.
But it is possible to increase your odds.
Here are ten ways to insure yourself a position as a Crush of the Day.
1. Write a comment on my blog using the phrase, “You are a genius.”
2. Find me a really good job or literary agent.
3. Email me nude photos of yourself. (women only)
4. Join “Bloggers with Biceps,” forget to exercise, and donate twenty dollars to me.
5. Name your newly born son Neilochka.
6. Name your newly bought vibrator Neilochka. (women only)
7. Convince Dooce to comment on my blog, saying “My blog sucks compared to this.”
8. Start a site titled “Sexiest Men on the Blogosphere” and only list me.
9. Be related to someone important.
10. Threaten me.