Let’s be honest with ourselves. None of us are getting rich off of blogging. In fact we’re probably losing money by not doing something more productive with our time. Yeah, we all deep-down believe that blabbing about the man/woman we shtupped last night is going to get us a book deal. But the chances are pretty slim, even if we’re shtupping them a lot.
There is only one way sure way to make money blogging — getting SPONSORS. Hey, if Tiger Woods is OK walking around with a Nike cap on 24/7, why wouldn’t I?
I know what you’re thinking. "Who the hell would want to sponsor me?" But I know the answer.
Companies involved in the travel industry.
Have you noticed an increase in the number of people who decide to travel the world and at the same time write it off? Take a look at The Traveling Guys web site for a brief moment. Ok? Did you see the sponsors section? No? Well, they have more than a hundred individual sponsors and a good dozen companies sponsoring their trip.
All of these guys are travelling for FREE, simply by blogging about their stupid experiences. As a cheap person, this is very attractive to me.
I thought long and hard to come up with my own gimmick. I love to travel and I don’t like to pay for myself. So far, so good.
What else do I love to do? I love to blog! And I love all my blogging friends!
That’s it! The answer.
Today, September 7, 2005, I officially announce the availability of sponsorship for the "Citizen of the Month" World Tour.
What is the World Tour? It means that I will take a year off and travel the world, visiting each person on my blogroll. All travelling expenses will be paid for by my sponsors. However, to save money, each person on my blogroll must put me up in their home, feed me, and take me on a 3-hour tour of their city.
Estee, you will have to put me up for two weeks because I really want to see Australia. Josia, we will have plenty of time to talk about Kabbalah when I stay with you for the entire Hebrew month of Adar. Modigli, you know I love you, but do I really want spend more than two days in Cleveland? Maybe you can come with me to Australia. Estee has plenty of room. JJ, I’ve always wanted to see Texas. I even own a cowboy hat that I wore once at a country dance club. Brooke, I will be visiting you in Florida for… well, let’s see how it goes…
I will be spending at least two months in New York, since there are so many bloggers there. Please argue among yourselves over who has the best apartment for me to stay in. I would prefer Manhattan over Brooklyn. Please, no Queens. If I have to live in Queens, I might as well stay with my parents.
Don’t worry, Californians. I won’t forget you. I will be giving up my apartment next month so I can live with each of you for two weeks. I should warn you, I do snore.
In case any of my women readers are concerned, I am a perfect gentleman. But if you do catch me trying to take a peek at you while you’re taking a shower — be advised that it is all for art — my next blog post and nothing else.
Sponsors, do you hear me? I mean you — American Airlines, Samsonite Luggage, Hertz Rent-a-Car, AOL, Australian Board of Tourism, Diet Coke, Bloglines, Gawker Media, NBC/Universal, The Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf, Hanes Underwear (the best!), the Rockefeller Foundation, Microsoft, the Jewish Federation, iPod, Taco Bell, and readers like YOU.
See you all soon!