the writing and photography of Neil Kramer

The Comments Section

a review of this blog from Secret Lake Diaries:

Citizen of the Month – a blog by Neil, a writer in LA, who is recovering from a breakup with his lady love.  His humorous blog is about his life and thoughts.  The really interesting thing to me in this blog is the comments section.  There is a strong, and seemingly close knit, community of readers that have a dynamic discussion in the comments section of each post. That, my friends, is where the true magic of this blog lies.  I am so envious! They are having a ball.

Awww… how nice. 

Bulls**t! 

THE REALY INTERESTING THING TO ME IN THIS BLOG IS THE COMMENTS SECTION?! 

THE TRUE MAGIC OF THE BLOG are your inane COMMENTS?!!!!

Well, screw you all. 

Conversation at BlogHer 08:

Mommyblogger1:  “Don’t you just love Dooce?”

Mommyblogger2:  “She is such an amazing writer!  She should a thousand book deals.”

Mommyblogger1:  “I just wish I had a quarter of the talent of “The Pioneer Woman.”  And those amazing contests.  Did you see that she recently offered some ipod-thingy as a prize and got 10,000 comments?”

Mommyblogger2:  “She deserves it.  Every one of them.  Her writing and photography are superb.”

Mommyblogger1:  “Have you ever read “Citizen of the Month?””

Mommyblogger2:  “You mean the “Talking Penis” guy?  He seems very immature and he frequently says “there” instead of “their.”  It is lazy writing.   Been like this ever since Sophia stopped editing his posts  I think “she” was the brains behind the whole operation.”

Mommyblogger1:  “Forget his uneven posts.  And I heard his penis isn’t all it is cracked up to be.  Just a little gossip from someone who had an “video-cam” conversation with him.  Besides, no one goes to his blog to READ the posts.  Ha ha, that would be silly.  He’s just writes the same things over and over again.  Jews, Sophia, his mother, and tits.  If you see him anywhere here at BlogHer, I say run the other way. ”

Mommyblogger2:  “So why do people go to his blog?”

Mommyblogger1:  “Don’t you get it?  THE REALY INTERESTING THING TO ME IN HIS BLOG IS THE COMMENTS SECTION!”

57 Comments

  1. sizzle

    I still think you should come to BlogHer. You can hang out with me. I won’t send you away.

    But only if you pinch my “toosh” again.

  2. Nance

    Neil said: Well, screw you all.

    You. Wish.

  3. Backpacking Dad

    My comments are the reason people read your blog?

    Awesome.

  4. schmutzie

    If it helps, I NEVER read the comments when I come here.

  5. Aimee Greeblemonkey

    Clearly me being so freaking busy that I haven’t had time to comment has helped you tremendously.

    You’re welcome.

  6. ingrid

    oh darling… people only comment on blogs when they love the writing/writer… and when it evokes something in them.

    i know you know this. it’s all about you. 🙂

  7. mary

    lol @ Nance. haha! I don’t find anything funny in this post but the comments are cracking me up. Ooh boy! *wipes tear*

    j/k Neil. 🙂

  8. natalie

    i love the writing and the comments. the writing seduces people so they feel like they have to comment! especially this post. who wouldn’t comment after reading it? to be left out of a post written about the comments would be unheard of. we love you neil!

  9. Sandi

    Hello, Neil. I am Secret Lake Diaries. I read your blog now and was SHOCKED to see my post on your blog. I really did not mean to offend you and besides, I am just an aging “mommyblogger” with an audience of five or ten, most of whom are related to me, so who the hell cares what I think?
    And yes, I do think the magic is in the comments – not because your posts are anything but funny and honest – but you have people that read and then care enough to comment and then DISCUSS. Come on, where else does this happen? I read lots of blogs and comment section are like shouts into an abyss. They are rarely acknowledged and there is no sense of conversation. You, my blogging friend, have connection, interaction and FUN on your blog. I say celebrate!
    Now back to my barren wasteland of a blog where my voice echoes in the silence.

  10. Memarie Lane

    You know, I’ve looked at both Dooce and Pioneer Woman and just don’t get it. IMO the only reason they’re where they are is b/c they’ve been around long enough and stuck with it. And PW is an amazing photographer. They’re good writers, but so are loads of other bloggers. And you know what? I’m not reading Douche or PW. I’m reading you.

  11. Neil

    Oh, Sandi, you didn’t offend me at all. I probably should have told you I was writing this beforehand. I absolutely agree with what you said about the commenters. I have said this myself many times. That is why I have such a hard time defining a “good blog.” There are plenty of blogs out there where the comments make the blog, and really make it special.

    Thanks for the mention. I hope people check out your site. It looks interesting.

  12. Jack

    Comments are what drive the best blogs.

  13. gorillabuns

    I don’t think you would be happy if you had zero comments.

  14. Alice

    i never read the comments, if it helps 🙂

  15. anymommy

    I read your posts and comments and sometimes even come back to see if there’s conversation. I don’t do that anywhere else – not a single other blog. You’re that darn good. Validating enough?

  16. better safe than sorry

    i think the most interesting part of this blog are your pics which in turn create those amazing comments. maybe you should give up writing and become a photographer.

  17. cajunvegan

    I aspire to be half the blogger you are, Neil.

    Never ever quit writing about your comments.

    😉

  18. miguelina

    Yours is the only blog where I come back to read the comments. They’re that good.

  19. Danny

    I never look at Dooce except when you mention her and I was STUNNED to see over 600 comments on her current post. Huh?? I really don’t get it. I’m surprised you don’t have twice that many since your blog is ten times better than hers but you DO get a ton and they are of a much higher quality than Dooce’s sycophants. I think your readership is among the most loyal in the blogosphere. I’d be seething with jealousy except that I think you deserve it.

  20. aka_monty

    All I can say is that I do not read either Dooce OR Pioneer Woman – even though the latter lives in my state.

    I do, however, religiously read Citizen Of The Month.

  21. wendy

    I have met some cool peeps thru your comments…

    I read em all the time.

    and so do you, which is soo sweet…

  22. Neil

    Thank you all, especially your generous comparisons of this blog with Dooce’s, making me feel like a giant among mommybloggers. However, and I say this with much love and respect to all of you — this blog is only as good as the comments. And frankly, your comments today have been rather dull and ass-kissy. Where is the humor? Where is the human drama? Where is the controversy?

    Isn’t it clear that readers come here because of your comments. You better pick up your game or you will be out as fast as Willie Randolph coaching the Mets.

    (that last line is there for my male readers to show that that despite my possible attending of BlogHer, I still do enjoy hanging with my bros and talking about that thing you call “sports.”)

    Except for Danny, who I talk to about Hollywood musicals.

  23. Noel

    I enjoy reading the commments. Wait…are you saying there’s also a POST?

  24. Turnbaby

    LMAO@ your last comment Neil

    I have NO clue why Dooce is so sppealing. Of course I don’t drink the Kool Aid on Oprah either;-)

  25. Turnbaby

    appealing–sheesh–slip o the tip

  26. Backpacking Dad

    How about:

    Fuck you, mouthbreather. If it weren’t for the comments and the off-chance that we’ll get a story about you actually sleeping with one of your readers I wouldn’t be back. Lucky for you I think you have a shot.

  27. kenju

    I never read the comments before, but maybe I should!

  28. Chag

    I only come here for the Talking Penis. I’ve been trying to teach mine to talk. He definitely thinks, but so far, no words.

  29. Jane

    Okay, I’ve been outed. I actually come here for Finn, Joe, and V-grrrl, all of whom I’m hoping for a cyber-date with. That’s right, Neil. I come here to CRUISE your fine stable of blog lovers. Your posts only provide the ambiance and pick-up lines. I imagine, with practice and longevity, Finn and V-grrrl will one day throw their bras my way. Joe will want to help me revisit heterosexuality — as an empirical experiment of course — in some hotel by the BlogHer convention. We all have dreams and these are mine. Damn you, Neil, for finally catching on.

  30. Avitable

    Hi, I’m here for the comment party.

  31. mp

    Guess what, I didn’t read ANY of the other comments..OMG Avitable commented in front of me

    lol at myself

  32. Kristabella

    I am not a mommyblogger, but I am going to BlogHer. And I’m so going to recreate that conversation.

    I hardly ever read comments either.

  33. Non-Highlighted Heather

    Well, I guess I’m in the minority by coming out and saying that I love Dooce. I’ve been called worse things than a (wince) sycophant. Things can get pretty sycophant-y around here too.

    I don’t even compare the two of you, nor would I ever think to. You’re both two completely different people with completely different perspectives and senses of humor. Dude, if I could blog and support my family and stay home, I’d be stoked. More power to her.

    And you my friend. You know how I feel about you. But I have to confess, I do come here for V-Grrl too. xo

  34. Non-Highlighted Heather

    Correction: V-grrrl.

  35. piglet

    in all honesty, i don’t read comments unless there are only one or two. if there are more than three, then i get lost. i used to read comments more, perhaps to get a “feel” for the audience…

    for me, i’m here for your superb writing and boob discussions.

  36. Fiesty Charlie

    Who the hell is Dooce? LOL

    I visit this blog for the humor, human suffering and wonderful writing style… Wait, did I just say human suffering? That is not what I meant!! You know what I meant right? The human factor of real life! {grin}

    You rock and your blog rocks, comments or no comments! Keep it up!

  37. AnnieH

    Finally! It’s about damn time my tremendous talent was discovered. Alright, I’m ready for my close up now.

  38. Neil

    Thanks. The comments picked up a bit since I complained. Your checks are in the mail.

  39. Neil

    Oh, and Christine from Watch Me, I will send you that Tootsie DVD that I promised you weeks ago when you won my crappy little contest. I promise. I’m just looking for a place that is cheaper than Amazon, and where I don’t have to pay tax.

    Just curious, it was on the USA Network last week, and I taped it with my old VCR. Will that be just as good?

  40. Nance

    Holy crap. I thought V-grrrl burned her bra back in…never mind.

  41. margalit

    Not the world’s biggest dooce fan either, although I do read her for the pictures of poor demented Chuck. But I’ll defend PW to the last. I LOVE her blog, and it’s very new. She’s only been blogging a couple of years now, and her blog is different and interesting for us city folk who have always longed to live the cowboy life.

    However, I never comment on either blogs and I comment here all the time. Mostly because you can have a conversation with the other commenters and it’s one big dysfunctional family. Oh, it reminds me of HOME!

    Love you, toots. Boston on the 4th?

  42. Christine

    What? You haven’t sent my DVD yet? I’ve talked it up to my kids and they spend HOURS gazing out the window waiting for the mail guy. When he pulls away, they run to the mailbox, breathlessly hoping that it has finally arrived.

    Please don’t send it. They have never been so focused and occupied. I have visions of a lovely summer of them quietly waiting for a video to arrive. Suckers.

    Oh, and the contest…it wasn’t crappy. It was all about high literature and THAT’S why I won. You must have forgotten.

  43. Neil

    Christine — crappy in that I didn’t offer an ipod or a week at the Movie Manor Motor Inn.

    I will send it tomorrow.

  44. Neil

    margalit — They are both great blogs. And I’m sure they are both extremely nice women. I hear Ree of the Pioneer Woamn is totally charming. But c’mon, when someone gets 10,000 comments and they are still hawking products, they deserve to be made fun of. They are the equivalent of our celebrities. When this blog becomes so big that I am earning my keep here — I INSIST that you make fun of me! It is part of life to make sure no ne takes themselves too seriously.

  45. Sarcastic Mom

    *smacks self in forehead*

    I never read the comments. Maybe I can find something there to redeem this place.

  46. TRO

    Mean Neil, you scared the mommy-blogger that talked nice about your blog the commenters on your blog.

  47. Non-Highlighted Heather

    At least you’d be earning your keep somewhere.

    ::tongue firmly planted in cheek::

  48. Neil

    Heather –I’ll come out and say it, too. I like Dooce’s blog. I think it is funny and classy. I’m sure she has a sense of humor about it all, so I don’t worry too much about her. But I’ll try not to make as many jokes about her. After all, she’s just another blogger, like the rest of us.

  49. V-Grrrl

    I’m commenter number 49????? Sheesh. It’s getting crowded in here, a little stuffy, hard to find a seat. Y’all gettin elbowed a lot over here? C’mon over to my place–and bring your own iPods, I’m just a starving writer people! No giveaways!

  50. V-Grrrl

    P.S. Jane and Non-Highlighted Heather, we have GOT to stop meeting like this.

    (Woo, hoo, comment #50. Do I get a prize, Neil, huh? Please?)

  51. akaky

    comments, what comments? I come here for the kreplach.

  52. Neil

    Akaky — You mean — you’ve had kreplach?

  53. Theresa B.

    So, we extras get a fat paycheck at the end of the fiscal, right?

  54. Akaky

    who hasn’t had kreplach? This is NY, Neil, where even the goyim are Jewish, sort of.

  55. Neil

    Hey, Akaky, you should come down to the city one day. We can go for some hamantashen!

  56. Karla

    The comments section? Bah. I think what’s interesting about this blog is the time and date stamp below each post.

  57. Neil

    Karla — that time stamp is usually wrong, so maybe that’s what makes it interesting.

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