With Sophia’s surgery coming up, I’m trying to not make the mistakes of the past, where I get more anxious than Sophia, and I’m the one who feels like fainting in the hospital.Â I don’t think I breathe properly, especially when I’m nervous.Â I also have a deviated septum, so I tend to breathe through my mouth, which I’ve read is NOT the best way to breathe.
I remember reading an article about some sort of yoga that deals specifically with breathing.Â Â Do any of you do yoga?Â What does it do for you?Â I really know very little about yoga, which should be a surprise to you, since there are as many yoga studios as fish taco stands in Redondo Beach.Â I’m most interested in the breathing aspect of it, rather than the ability to flex myself like a pretzel.Â Â They do yoga at the gym, but it seems less focused on breathing than exercise.Â Â I’m also a little turned off by the pseudo-religious aspects of places like the Rising Lotus Yoga Studio:
Come join us for an evening of ecstatic chanting. No singing experience needed, only a willingness to open your heart (and your mouth) to the blissflul flow. Kirtan (from the sanskrit word for singing) is easily learned and instantly memorable. The form is simple: a lead group calls out the melodies. The crowd responds. Sanskrit, the language of ancient India, is also the mother tongue of many modern languages. But the true meaning of its sounds are in the effect they create. As everyone’s breathing becomes synchronous, a feeling of unity and timelessness arises. When we sing without restraint our heartfelt expression brings peace and joy and meditation follow effortlessly.
Am I being too judgemental?Â If we’re going to be singing songs to relax, why do we have to do it in Sanskrit?Â If we’re going to use some obscure language, why not Yiddish?Â
And most importantly, through yoga, can I really perfect my tantric lovemaking like Sting?
I’ll probably wimp out about going to yoga, but I’m still curious about YOUR experiences, and what type of yoga you most recommend.Â
A Year Ago on Citizen of the Month:Â Fat People