Of all of the blogging friends I’ve made, I am particularly fond of the several wonderful bloggers who either live in France or are of French heritage. I have no idea how I connected with all these Frenchies and Francophiles, considering I’ve mostly either made fun of the French or called France anti-Semitic for their knee-jerk anti-Israel politics. Just last week I needled Elisabeth about the fact that the peace-loving French are now bigger arms dealers to the developing world than the United States.Â Who’s eating the freedom fries now, huh?Â
But my French readers know I am more bark than bite.Â They know that secretly, I would like nothing more than to stroll up and down Boulevard St. Germain flirting with a beautiful Parisian woman, charming her blouse Decoupe off with my one semester college French.
Voulez-vous coucher avec moi (ce soir)?
French is so classy!
Last night, I reached into my inner-Gallic and went with Sophia to the 23rd Annual Beaujolais and Beyond Festival in Los Angeles, sponsored by the French-American Chamber of Commerce. The event was basically a wine-tasting of “le Beaujolais Nouveau 2006.” While I like wine as much as the next guy, I cannot tell the difference between the $2.99 stuff at Trader Joe’s and a $300 dollar bottle of wine. But I’m sure it just takes experience, and I was willing to learn. I mean, I can taste the difference between Coke and Diet Coke with my eyes closed, so why not wine? It was interesting hearing knowledgeable French people talk about the differences between Chiroubles and Fleurie. When the server asked me what I wanted to try next, I answered, “red wine.”
So, there I was, getting drunk, listening to people speaking French, which is always sexy, and watching beautiful women walking to and fro, and I started fantasizing about living in Paris, sitting in a little cafe, surrounded by Alison, Elisabeth, Blue Poppy, La Coquette, Lauren, Maitresse, Paris Parfait, Rue Rude, Michele, Anne, as they all took turns singing Edith Piaf songs to me while I played my accordion, wrote a novel, and painted a nude all at the same time.
Ah, what a life!
But then I splashed some Volvic on my face and woke up to reality. I stood up, and shouted, “I love all you French people. You are beautiful and cultured. But I am an American. A proud American. France might have culture, high fashion, and orange flavored water, but America has — THANKSGIVING!
Yes, that’s right. What is more American than stuffing your face with turkey and celebrating some religious fanatic pilgrims? Who needs the Louvre when we have the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade? I watch it every year hoping that the Underdog balloon finally gets punctured and falls on top of the unsuspecting crowd huddling in the freezing cold. Now that would be funny!
Americans are innovators and are not afraid of adding new traditions to their old favorites. For instance, last year, the blogosphere went wild over my Thanksgiving meme “Thank Your First Commenter Day.”
That’s why the TRADITION MUST CONTINUE:
THE SECOND ANNUAL “THANK YOUR FIRST COMMENTER DAY” — this Wednesday, the day before Thanksgiving.
(the following is reprinted from last year because I know many of you are lazy and hate clicking on links to old posts)
Many years ago the Pilgrims came to these Shores, and couldn’t figure out what the hell to eat. They were unfamiliar with the weird-looking animals and crops of this New World, the winter was coming, and frankly, these future Mayflower WASPS just weren’t that bright.
(This was years before the Africans, the Chinese, the Germans, the Irish, the Jews, and the Italians came and actually built this country for them.)
But, back to the story of Thanksgiving.
The Pilgrims were saved by the kind Native Americans, who showed them how to eat corn, potatoes, wild turkey, and canned Ocean Spray cranberry sauce. Because of these kind Indians, today we celebrate Thanksgiving.
(The fact that we later killed these Native Americans, took their land, and forced them to run casino operations is something we can deal with on another day.)
Today, it is all about GIVING THANKS.
How can we thank our fellow BLOGGERS?
We read each other, we help each other with our designs and templates, and we cry on each other’s shoulder when a “blog crush” goes sour.
On Thanskgiving, we should THANK our fellow bloggers.
When I first started blogging, I was like a Pilgrim who just landed on Plymouth Rock. I was isolated and alone. For weeks, I wrote this blog without any direction or confidence in my ability. And then he appeared — like the Native American with his corn — my first commenter!
Although I appreciate all of my lovely readers, today I want to give a special shout-out to TERRY FINLEY. He wrote the first comment on “Citizen of the Month” back in April:
Nice blog. Thank you.
Our health is really important.
Check out my blog.
It may not be poetry, but it touched my heart. Afterwards, I commented on his site, and then we lost touch, which so frequently happens in our busy blogging lives. I tried to click on his link today, but he seems to have stopped blogging. I sincerely hope my comment wasn’t the cause of him losing interest in blogging.
Terry, if you’re out there, I’d like to thank you and say hello. I hope that you are happy, healthy, and having a lot of sex!
If YOU would like to participate in this “THANKSGIVING DAY THANK YOUR FIRST COMMENTER DAY,” it is simple:
Go into your archives and find the first person who ever commented on your blog.
Copy the URL and a special thank-you message on Wednesday– and post it either in my comments OR on your own site.
If you don’t have any comments yet, don’t feel like a loser. Did the Pilgrims give up? Of course not. They just stole from the Indians. Just write a comment here at “Citizen of the Month” about how much of a loser you are and pretty soon, everyone will come to you, showing pity. In this competitive blogging world, you have to use whatever works.
See you here on Wednesday for “Thank Your First Commenter Day!”
And stay tuned for more information about another holiday tradition, the First Annual Blogger’s Christmahanukwanzaakah Online Holiday Concert. I need to start making an official list of who is singing/playing what song, just to make sure that two bloggers don’t fight over who gets to sing “Little Drummer Boy.”
Of course, everyone is invited to participate, even the French.