Citizen of the Month

the writing and photography of Neil Kramer

Plastic Surgery of The Future: Talking Tits

Announcer outside the Kodak Theater on Oscar Night, 2010:  "Next on the Red Carpet — Jennifer Lopez, accompanied by her tits!"

J-Lo:  "Ready, tits?"

J-Lo’s tits:  "Onward.  To our fans!"

jlo2.jpg

17 Comments

  1. it’s nice to know i’m not the only one always feeling myself up. lol.

  2. I thought it was her ass that was famous.

  3. Yeah, I know it is her ass that’s famous. But it’s Saturday night, and I’m with Sophia, who is sleeping with the flu, and I wish I was going out with somebody tonight, and there’s nothing on TV, and for some reason this picture of J-Lo and her tits just made me feel a little better.

  4. I was just watching the boob tube…I love irony (not to be confused with I love ironing)

  5. I really don’t want to hear what my tits might have to say.

  6. you never know — her ass might talk, too. I wonder what it would have to say?

  7. there’s a fart joke in there somewhere, but i’m just going to leave it be.

  8. Maybe they’re the one’s responsible for all the awful career advice. Could be what drove Ben off too. They look catty to me.

  9. I’ve noticed alot of celebrity woman do this when they have these dresses on. Paranoid on the red carpet?? I guess they’ve seen enough of Anna Nicole and Tara Reid.

  10. All those years watching Michael Jackson grab his crotch gave her some ideas.

  11. J-Lo tastes great, but is less filling.

  12. Personally, you have to figure that if her breasts were talking, they’re talking out of the nipple area, and that means that more often than not, those babies are gonna be muffled. You won’t be able to hear a thing.

    Honestly, that would get really annoying, constantly having to ask your breasts to either enunciate or speak up.

  13. It’s her fault for wearing that crap. If I remember correctly that dress was not super flattering on her. I think it was peach colored. Like a prom dress. Who wears peach?

  14. I agree with you but I don’t think anyone is looking at the peach dress.

  15. perhaps she needs help…I could be of assistance…

  16. I thought that celebrities had tape to hold up dresses like that.

  17. Is there problem, officer?
    I do the same when wearing my strapless. I mean, did. It used to fit, you know.

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