the writing and photography of Neil Kramer

Therapy 03/04/08

I just came out of therapy. This is how it went with my therapist, Brenda.

Therapist: Hi, Neil.

Neil: Hello, Brenda.

Therapist: How are you doing?

Neil: I want to show you something on the computer. My blog post today. I wrote it last night.

We both sit by her desktop.

Neil: Friday is my birthday.

Therapist: Happy early birthday.

Neil: This is sort of embarrassing, but I asked readers to send in photos of their bras.

Therapist: I’m reading that.

Neil: Now, I’m thinking the whole thing is just crazy. Why would I ask for women’s bras?

Therapist: Why do you think?

Neil: Maybe I’m just feeling horny and lonely now that I’m moving out soon.

Therapist: Then you wouldn’t just ask for bras hanging on towel racks, would you? It probably is deeper than that.

Neil: Well, what else could it be?

Therapist: Maybe the bra represents… women… blah blah… nurturing… we all… blah blah… need love… you are a man… blah blah… sexuality important… need comfort… mother… and breasts… blah blah…

Neil: Hmmm… if I asked you to show me your bra, would you do it?

Therapist: Sure.

Brenda lifts up her blouse to show me her frilly pink bra.

Neil: Thanks, Brenda.

Therapist: Anytime, Neil. But time’s up!


6) Books by Charles Dickens

7) Cool Men’s Belts


  1. david

    What about kids playing in the park? That one makes me happy.

  2. better safe than sorry

    always trying to please others, even for your own birthday.

  3. Neil

    David — Kids playing in the park? Tell me your birthday, and I’ll email you that photo. Kids playing in the park do not make me happy unless I am one of the kids playing in the park!

    A woman in a bra eating a bagel in Central Park — now we’re talking!

  4. will

    About two weeks before shutting my blog down last week I asked my therapist if she’d like to check mine out. She said yes and so I gave the the address. I had to miss a week but the next time I saw her I asked if she had read it and she said “I looked today, but I couldn’t figure it out”.

    I was kind of relieved that she hadn’t read too much. I’ll see what kind of pictures I can send you.

  5. JoAnne

    Hmm, I would think you’d like to have pictures of women’s boobs, not their bras. Or their boobs in their bras, maybe?

  6. Neil

    Well, my therapist won’t read it on her own. And she has very specific instructions on how to proceed. She will only look at something that directly relates to something I want to talk about.

    She wants to make sure that the blog-reading is for my “progress,” and not because I just want her to read something. It was actually pretty hard for me to show her the “bra” post, because it is one thing to write in online, within the context of my blog. It is very different having to explain to an outsider…

    Maybe she has a good poker face, but she wasn’t too surprised. She seems to understand men pretty well.

  7. Neil

    Joanne — Brenda and I talked about that. Asking for boobs is a bit too sexual for me. The bra makes it a bit sexual, but more PG-13 and nurturing, with some mystery intact. Mystery is hot, and more my speed.

    I’m more burlesque than strip joint.

  8. Sarcomical

    HA! oh, neil. i’d be so so happy to send you a pic of the pizza i just ate.

    seriously, i’m hoping this birthday is way more happy than you can anticipate. 🙂

  9. MammaLoves

    Cool men’s belts make you happy?? Now that is something I would delve into in therapy.

  10. teahouseblossom

    I’d be glad to send you a photo of my bra, Neil. Just tell me when :o)

  11. Bre

    The ultimate trump would be,obviously, to get all of those into one photo… hmm…

  12. Pants

    You make me want to return to therapy.

  13. Eileen Dover

    I can’t believe women are whining about sending you their bra picture.

    Geez. Just go to the hamper and snap a picture with a cameraphone.

    (I think there are too many whiners in the world. It’s not like you asked everyone to take pictures of their pink bits.)

  14. savia

    I was with you until you asked for books by Charles Dickens. Seriously? The only thing interesting about Dickens is the fact that he has “dick” in his name.

    I don’t get the bra controversy myself. It’s a piece of clothing. But then again, I’m a bellydancer, so pretty much everyone’s seen me in a bra. In fact, the first time I met Superstar’s mom and dad, I was gyrating on stage in one. I was a bit concerned until his mom said, “You make me want to take bellydancing…again!”

    I think it’s hilarious that you asked for pics, and if people don’t like it, they don’t have to contribute. It’s your blog and your birthday. Enjoy it!

  15. Neil

    Savia, Eileen — To be fair, no one is whining about bras. They are people being kind towards me — thinking that this is hurting my already rocky relationship with Sophia, and screwing up chances for a reconciliation. I actually appreciate their concern, although my issues with Sophia have very little to do with bras or my crazy blog posts. Until recently, she was the one editing my posts.

  16. sarah g

    thats sweet that you appreciate their concern. mens belts? really?

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