the writing and photography of Neil Kramer

It’s Not That Complicated


I try to understand you and give you what I got
To brush my teeth, to buy you shoes,
To play with your g-spot.


So why must you confuse
what was easy when we dated.
Man and Woman, all that crap — it’s not that complicated.


  1. E

    Is that an original poem? First comment….??

  2. E

    Now that I have indeed got first comment I can sound a little more intelligent.

    Um, nice poem.

    You know how with the internet, simultaneous experience and time difference and all that, you think you’ve got first dibs but then someone beats you to it…

    Wait, back to the post —

    Nice poem.

  3. sassy

    Yea, we women are pretty good at driving poor helpless scmucks bazonkers. But it’s so hard to stand it when we give you all the clues and YOU JUST ACT LIKE WE ARE SPEAKING CHINESE.

    Oops. Soory Neil. I forgot for a minute there that I wasn’t talking to my husband.

    Good luck with Sophia. I hope she is saner than I am. (;

  4. Bre

    The best I can say is that we don’t mean to drive men absolutely insane – it jsut seems to come naturally!

  5. teahouseblossom

    Yeah, sorry about that with us women.

    I’m not sure what the answer is. I told my Fiance last night that we like to be complimented. That’s a good start.

    Good luck.

  6. MammaLoves

    The rules change on both sides don’t they?

    *sigh* I know.

  7. mckay

    mmm, i don’t think it’s so much that we like to be complicated – we just can’t help it. God made us this way..tons o hormones w/ emotions we are compelled to discuss.
    it’s an old book, but Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus does an excellent job of explaining it all.

  8. Hilly

    Amen, my friend….a-freaking-men.

  9. churlita

    I’m right there with you. I know exactly what I want in a relationship and I tell the guy I’m with. So, he can decide if he wants the same thing. The problem with that, is that men don’t seem to know what they want either. The last guy I was with said he wanted me, but he had depression and anxiety issues that he wasn’t going to get help for, so he really couldn’t handle being in a relationship. It would have been nice to know that at the beginning.

  10. patois

    Not unlike two different species at all, eh?

  11. scarlet hip

    You know where the G-spot is?

  12. Neil

    Scarlet — I’m sorry, that was a typo. I meant I helped her use the f-stop on her new camera.

  13. Mr. Fabulous

    You are a fucking genius.

  14. Finn

    It really shouldn’t be that hard. Why is it?

  15. V-Grrrl

    Overheard in my circle:

    “You know what–I don’t NEED a husband. I just need a girlfriend with a penis.”

    Long pause, then she adds.

    “I’m not even sure I need the penis…”

    I think she’s found her own G-spot. Her husband needs to be worried. Very worried.

    Keep buying shoes….

  16. brettdl

    Most women I’ve met don’t tell you what they want when it comes to behavior within the relationship. They hint, but they expect you to figure it out since they don’t know either. But when you do figure it out, RUN with it. Until she changes her mind. Then find it again and RUN with that.

  17. Dave

    Try adding a kid to that mess. It’s a blast.

  18. sassy

    My question is that if we women are such emotional freakazoids (which we are), why do you keep coming back? It so blinkin’ mysterious !

  19. brettdl

    Oh, we’re just as messed up, just in different ways.

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