I received an email today asking if Sophia and I got along during our road trip. And the answer is, “Yes.” This is very surprising because we usually have our worst fights while on the road. All the new stimuli can create a lot of tension. So, what was different this time? Did therapy help? Prozac? “The Secret?”
It is something I would like to nominate for the 2007 Nobel Peace Prize.
For generations, there has been war. Each time a man and woman get together to travel to a new destination, the fragile harmony is always broken by bickering and verbal insults.
“Why don’t you ask for directions?” the woman asks, her voice shrill with nagging.
“I have a c**k, woman!” the hot-headed male responds. “It will point me in the right direction.”
“It certainly had a lot of trouble pointing anywhere last night!” she answers, throwing the first grenade, signalling a readiness to use weapons of mass destruction on the male’s Achilles heel — his ego.
Soon, the male brings up the female’s “weight,” which means only one thing — all-out war.
How many divorces have occurred over asking directions? Throughout history, this event has occurred over and over again — on camels, on horse and buggies, on Volkswagen Bugs (I punch you). The Trojan War — started over bad directions. Henry VIII killed his third wife for constantly bringing up a right turn he made in London once when he was supposed to go left.
But now — FINALLY — there is peace and love on our modern highways and freeways. There is fraternity among the sexes. The automobile has become a friendly place again. There is less fighting over directions, and more lovemaking in the backseat — all because of one invention.
The Future Winner of the 2007 Nobel Peace Prize — GPS Navigation!
How can you argue over a robot chick with a pleasant voice who knows how to go EVERYWHERE?
A Year Ago on Citizen of the Month: Really Extreme Makeover: Home Edition