the writing and photography of Neil Kramer

The Yelp of a Woman

I’m online way too much.  Blogging, Twitter, Facebook.  Is it my unsettled situation with Sophia that has caused me to look to a virtual world for connection?

And where is Sophia?   Why have my readers heard so little about her from me during the last few months?   Surely she must be living in up in chic and trendy LA, laughing at this little imaginary world I have created for myself while I sit in my childhood bedroom in Queens.

Well, surprisingly, she has taken the same route.  Welcome Sophia to social media.   No, she is not blogging.   No, she thinks Twitter is a waste of time.  No, she still thinks Facebook is for those with arrested development, poking and superpoking each other like children.

Sophia is too opinionated for such mild activities.  She has found her niche in Yelp:  Real People.  Real Reviews.   Absolutely perfect for her!   (I just hope there isn’t a category where Yelpers can review the sexual performance of their separated spouses)

And yesterday, there she was, her smiling face on the front page of the Los Angeles Yelp portal, with the “Review of the Day,” (or ROTD as Yelpers call it) “as voted by our members.”

Apparently, in Yelp-land, this is a big honor.  In fact, in addition to dozens of “congrats”, Sophia already got some angry message from another yelper who didn’t think it was fair that Sophia should get the “Review of the Day” after only three months of being on Yelp and having barely written 22 reviews, when HE has been on Yelp for four years, has written hundreds of reviews and never received this “ROTD.”

Ha Ha, Welcome to social media, newbie Sophia!


  1. Annie

    Sophia looks great. Yelp sounds interesting, I have to agree with her about Facebook, as I hate it myself.
    I have been meaning to ask, how long are you staying in NY anyway?

  2. Neil

    Annie, still unclear. My mother is going to Florida from January-April and this apartment will be empty. It depends on what happens with Sophia and with some project in LA that will make me return earlier. For now, it is the best financial and emotional arrangement for us. For now.

  3. Wendy

    I hate that you have to tell her to watch her back! Some women are such bitches.

  4. Neil

    Wendy — Hmmm… I wonder if I should take that line out…

  5. anna

    Hmm. Interesting.

  6. Chantel

    I was really bummed to find out Yelp was like all the other Social Consumer Review sites. According to the advertising package my restaurant was presented with; “if you pay for advertising or sponsorship then the bad reviews are suppressed.”

    I quit Yelp immediately.

  7. Kathy

    Yelp looks pretty interesting. (Like I need another online obsession, though.)

  8. Geoff

    She’s a great writer, Neil – wry, witty and funny, just like yourself.

    I would ask a probing question, such as ‘Is it good or bad for a relationship, when both partners are such talented writers?’ but it’s probably not appropriate. So I won’t.

  9. Neil

    Chantel — wow, I wonder if she knows that. That is a bit of a pyramid scheme to get people to pay Yelp for advertising. I’m curious what Sophia is going to say when she finds out about that!

  10. Finn

    How typical of Sophia to rise straight to the top.

    And how sad and pathetic is that hater that e-mailed her? Get over it.

  11. SJ

    I am ASTOUNDED to hear that Sophia is on Yelp! She seemed far too conservative to be drawn to them. Of course, I’m basing that on the San Diego Yelp!,which is quite uninhibited. For example, today’s newsletter asks the question, “San Diego: Spanish for a whale’s va-jay-jay?”

    I love Yelp! although, like any review site, you have to take them with a grain of salt. Sometimes it seems that the drunker the reviewer got, the better the review. But I guess that makes sense.

  12. churlita

    I’ve never heard of YELP before. Then again, I’m still confused by Twitter, so that’s not surprising.

  13. Arjewtino

    My girlfriend has for years rejected my pleas for her to start blogging.

    But she’s, apparently, a superstar on this Yelp thing.

    Yes, I’m a little jealous.

  14. Neil

    SJ — Oh, she is not “conservative” in THAT way. Politics maybe… but she would go to a strip club before I would.

  15. apathy lounge

    Good thing my “babies” are 6′ tall now and wearing them would just be counterproductive. And embarrassing for them. Gotta wonder what Darren Stevens and Larry Tate would have thought of the Motrin ad. Also? It’s my Three Year Blogiversary, Neil. Come by!

  16. leah

    welcome sophia! i’m not on yelp, but peeved michelle is and if she’s on it then it must be a good site.

    and kudos for hitting the front page…

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