After telling the whole world on my last post that I was going to New York for a month and staying with my mother, I forgot to tell one person — my mother. She sent me an email complaining that she was the last person to know, and had to read about it on my blog.
“Sorry about that, Mom. I was going to tell you. But, it should be fun. We can do things together.”
“Actually, the first weekend you are here, I’m going to a Mah Jongg tournament in Atlantic City with Shirley.”
“Well, then… when you come back.”
“Don’t you remember. I’m going on that eight day cruise to… Alaska.”
“Alaska?! What are you going to do there?”
“To see the glaciers.”
“Oh, and hey, even better… fresh Alaskan lox!”
“Exactly. I’ll bring the bagels with me. In case there are no Jews up there.”
“There’s that guy from Northern Exposure. Did you know he was supposed to be from Flushing? He went to Columbia, too.”
“Yeah, but unlike you, he was a doctor.”
“What a Jewish mother cliche, Mom. You know, doctors don’t do as well as they used to. All the HMOs.”
“Still better than blogging, right?”
Truth Quotient: 89% — 1) I already knew that she was going to Alaska. 2) I made up my mother’s last comment about blogging. Maybe I should have just ended it after the “doctor” line. 3) Oh, she didn’t really say that “doctor” line, either.
Everything else was true.