Citizen of the Month

the writing and photography of Neil Kramer

Yes, I am Jim

Note:  This is the third time I am re-publishing this so-so post.  I’m not this anal in real life.   The problem with the post, as you will see, is that the joke is based on me getting an email from HOLLY Newberry, when in reality, I received an email from a reader named HOLLIE Newberry.  Time for new glasses.

OK, here is the earlier post:

Once upon a time, people said I looked like John Lennon. Later, I was mistaken for Bill Gates. (you can read my depressingly awful first attempt at a “poem” about this subject here)

Last year, in IHOP, I was thought to be the actor who played Kirk from “The Gilmore Girls.” (I know the show just ended. What happened to Kirk anyway?)

Today I received an email:


I’m a (somewhat) loyal reader of Citizen of the Month. Being the brave man you are, you post pictures of your self for all the world to see. While watching a mini-marathon of Shear Genius, and drinking vodka after 4 shots of novocaine and some happy gas at the dentist, I noticed that you look like the long lost brother of one of the contestants. I can’t remember his name, but I know he left the show early for his doing of horrible hair. Here he is:


Did I tell you or what?


Hollie Newberry

I scratched my head for a few minutes, wondering if this was a legitimate email. Other than us both wearing glasses, I don’t think I look anything like him. His name is “Jim” and he was eliminated from Bravo’s hair-styling reality show, Sheer Genius.

How do I know that information? Because I looked it up on Google.

I also Googled the email author, Hollie Newberry, and came up with this:


(Men, if you do a search, you will find much much better photos of Hollie, who is apparently a famous British cheerleader)

Now, the emailer might not be THIS “Hollie,” but if she is, “Yes, I am Jim of Shear Genius.”

Note:  So, bascially, the whole post was based on a spelling error.  The email was from HOLLIE, not HOLLY, and I’m sure Hollie now hates me and will never read my blog again.  There was some more stuff to this post, but I deleted it.   Can I now move on to something new?

Have a great weekend!


  1. you’ve been added to

  2. Oh yeah, I know Holly/Hollie. She spells her name both ways. One way on this side of the pond and the other way on the other side of the pond so she will be able to remember which side of the pond she is on.

    And she said she is mad at you for suggesting that the posted pic is not of her and will most likely not be willing to have your baby now.

    Sorry dude, you blew your chance.

  3. This is what happens when you remember your dreams – a confusing dream will confuse you. Best you forget what happens when you sleep so that you can concentrate better and not mistake your readers as being porn stars!

    Have a great weekend – do something fun – go find a snow cone and make a total mess of it!

  4. Not only would I not let that guy cut my hair, I wouldn’t even let him walk my dog.

    But you, Neil, I would let style my hair and feed my cat.

    You don’t look like Jim, and sadly, I don’t look like Holly. (I look better than Holly! Want to see my tattoo?)

  5. First of all, you’re darling. In every sense of the word.

    I love Shear Genius, but Jim was definitely not my fave. And you resemble him basically in no way.

    Finally, is wearing your country’s flag on a skimpy pair of knickers even legal?

  6. I am watching that marathon today! I am watching it right now, as a matter of fact. It’s a good show. And I don’t even pay for haircuts.

  7. Heather Anne — Sophia is watching it too. She said Jim was the worst stylist. Just my luck! Soon, I’m going to meet him at Supercuts.

  8. I hate having my hair cut. I am not at all imaginative about it. I get it done because I have to and I go where I know I will get it done right the first time.

  9. i googled my (image) name and came up with a cemetery and a dear jane letter. i don’t think i look like either. thankfully.
    have a wonderful weekend!

  10. dang, misspell my name. i wanna look that hot.

  11. Ha! No, I’m not that Hollie, although my husband kept telling me when we first met that there was an “actress” with the same name as me. And though I’ve been to the UK a few times, I’m not blonde, and haven’t been a cheerleader since high school. Hate to burst the bubble.

  12. Hollie, you seem much nicer than Holly anyway!

  13. Lol, I liked Kirk! And I’m in love with John Lennon. But that’s beside the point…I just stumbled across your blog and have read a few posts, you’re quite funny

  14. holly newberry

    June 10, 2007 at 11:04 am

    haha i just searched my name HOLLY NEWBERRY to find some pics and found this page, i am holly from the pic u have posted,what the fucks this all about anyway,mental

  15. holly newberry

    June 10, 2007 at 11:05 am

    oh and im not being rude,just confused????x

  16. If you were that Holly Newberry, would you really be using a hotmail account?

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