Citizen of the Month

the writing and photography of Neil Kramer

Looking What’s Under

kmen.jpg

What do Hugh Grant, Luke Perry, Desi Arnaz Jr., and Harry Truman all have in common?  They are all uncircumsized!  This extremely weird website is an anti-circumcision site and they try to convince you of their opinions by using the oldest trick in the advertising book — celebrity endorsements!    (thanks Rob)

Hey, if Johnny Mathis and Vladimir Putin are uncut (or "intact" as they call it)  why shouldn’t I be?

I’ve never heard the expression "intact" before.  Does that mean the rest of us are not intact? 

And the obvious question is — how does this website know?  I read David McCullough’s masterful biography of Harry Truman, and there wasn’t one mention of his penis in the book’s 1120 pages.

Also, according to my post from last week, Batman is on our side.

UPDATE July7:  Who knew?   A few days later, the heated subject of circumcision is in the news.

17 Comments

  1. ‘ how does this website know? ‘..well obviously they send the cockarazzi in to the washrooms at Le Dome, Musso & Franks, Nate n Als etc etc

  2. Batman is on our side.

    Okay, but Superman is on our side. Because let’s face it, no one in Smallville has the clippers to cut little Clark.

  3. This is another thing I love about this blog: not only is Neil’s writing fresh and funny, some of the people who comment are also so much fun.
    Cockarazzi! Way to go, Moviequill 🙂

  4. Richard, you’re completely wrong about Superman. See Action Comics #133 — “Superboy’s Bris.”

    The only truly successful uncircumsized superhero was Captain America, but even he changed his mind after marrying Rachel Goldstein 1n 1982 and settling down in Great Neck, Long Island.

  5. Thanks, Neil. I have a post coming up about circumcision. It will be controversial!

  6. Hmm, Neil, I think you may be confusing Superboy with Jimmy Olsen. Earth doctors couldn’t even figure out how to give Superman a vaccine injection, much less sever his foreskin.

    We can also infer that the superhero Wolverine is uncircumcised, for two reasons:
    (1) Wolverine is from Canada, where circumcision is much less common than in America;
    (2) even if by chance he were circumcised as a Canadian baby, he wouldn’t stay circumcised, since he has the mutant power of rapid regeneration.

  7. Richard, eveything you want to know about Wolverine — and I mean everything — will be revealed in my screenplay for X-Men 4.

  8. I don’t have an intelligent argument for endorsing circumcision. I don’t know if Spiderman or Captain America or the Hulk is circumcised. I have just one word to offer: smegma.

  9. Just shows you how innocent I am — I had to look it up. Advice to others innocents: you don’t want to know.

  10. Oy, I am really happy not being one of the turtle boys. Cut, crisp and clean for me.

  11. Just one more: I was going to mention the Mighty Thor as another superhero who, due to his cultural background as a pre-Christian Northern European god, is probably not circumcised.

    However, I think most mythologists would agree that Thor’s hammer is a symbol, if you know what I mean– it prominently featured in the ancient Norse marriage ceremony for example. And– I am not making this up– when Thor’s hammer was forged, the dwarves made the handle just a little too short.

    So. We’ll put down Thor as a maybe.

  12. I think we have officially participated in the geekiest discussion ever done on a blog: which superhero is circumsized?!

  13. Men In Kilts!

    Neil, you made my day! 🙂

  14. Great site, I like it 🙂

    Err I went and looked and thought it’s an amazing but small list of well known people. There are other websites out there – I was sent to one at the turn of the century by a girlfriend who couldn’t understand why anyone would want to have a cigar looking thing. It was a south american site with ‘little head’ shots. Nuff said. Being I’m from Canda I can say that it’s not “less common” here it’s just optional and many of the citizens of our country have traditions that don’t include the snip.

  15. Never heard of “intact” you say? Open your eyes my friend. You cut guys are not only “not intact”, you’re mutilated.. . . and what you’re missing. Ignorance is bliss, n’est-ce pas?

  16. Why should anyone cut off a part of a baby? It took 9 months to grow just like your fingernails and lungs, doesn’t it make sense that it’s supposed to be there?
    When is it ever okay to cut a baby for any reason? Especially since those babies are wide awake with no anesthesia. The smegma thing is stupid. Smegma is clean, not dirty. It moisturizes the glans and its antibacterial and antiviral properties keep the penis clean and healthy. If guys shower regularly, whether they are cut or intact, they do not smell and do not have a build up of anything. You have to rinse your penis either way so that argument holds no water.

    I feel sorry for you cut guys and your partners, though. You’ll never know that sex could have been 10,000 times better with a whole, functioning penis 🙁

    • You are so right, Brittany.
      As usual, circumcised men lives in a Bizarro World.
      It is such a sad commentary that people and website that are anti-circumcision are deemed “extremely weird”.

      As for the word intact, yes, you circumcised men are NOT intact. A functional part of your penis have been removed.

      As for all the arguments for circumcsion:

      1. It’s for hygiene!
      You DO take baths don’t you?

      2. Smegma!
      You Do take baths don’t you?

      3. It’s hard to clean!
      It is easier to clean than your ass and your teeth. I guess some men are either just too lazy or dumb to clean themselves.

      4. Sons and fathers should match!
      I guess circumcised men DO live in a Bizarro World. I have never seen my dad’s private parts and do you tell me that fathers and sons compare genitals? Why not dye his hair color dark if you are dark haired and he is blond. What do you do if the eye color don’t match?

      5. It looks better!
      To whom? Women and men who are conditioned to think the natural penis is gross and ugly? And what does it matter how it looks, last I heard only pervs walks around exposing their junks to the world. And during sex, when the penis gets erect, the foreskin pulls back so appearance-wise there is no difference. But I guess circumcised men wouldn’t know that.

      6. It prevents diseases!
      Then I suggest you cut men go and have unprotected sex with an infected partner. You can’t? So you go get circumcised only to wear a condom anyway?

      7. Well, what if you gonna have sex and there’s no condom around?
      Then you are stupid and deserve what you get.

      8. It prevents penile cancer!
      Chances are your, your liver, heart and lungs and other part of your body is going to kill you than your foreskin.

      9. It doesn’t matter, I never had a problem with my cut dick!
      That is great, but the choice was made for you. Why cut it off when there is no reason for it? Then again, ignorance is bliss as you don’t want what you have and once you had it you don’t want to lose it. Or perhaps circumcised men would want others to be circumcised because misery loves company.

      10. I was just an infant and wouldn’t perceive it nor remember it!
      I suppose pedophiles can use that same excuse, huh?

      10. It’s for religious reason!
      There were religions that requires human sacrifice and the immolation of infant. But it is true that Judaism and Islam have this circumcision rite and men are pressured into it as they have a lot to lose if they don’t go through with it.

      11. I would get made fun of in the gym!
      Really, do cut men (and boys) look at other men’s and boy’s penises all the time and feel the need to comment? Are they really that immature?

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