the writing and photography of Neil Kramer

Notes on My Last Post

According to my last post, my view of myself is slightly different than your view of Neilochka.   I would probably pick these three as my main “characteristics” —

1) Imaginative, head-in-the-clouds guy who can never find his own keys or his own underwear.

2) Bullshitting male who enjoys nothing better than chatting with “the guys” in a coffee shop.

3) Nervous, overly apologetic person, needing affirmation from others.

But am I right?  Or am I deluding myself?  I had trouble sleeping last night, tossing and turning, wondering if I truly knew myself. Your comments didn’t bother me at all, but my own opinion of the real Neilochka was torturing me!  Eventually, at around 3AM, I calmed myself down.

“Does anyone really “know” himself?” I asked myself.

Probably not.  This was quite a relief.

There was something else that was bugging me ALL day —

Did you know that when you write 8 ) in WordPress, it automatically turns into a smilie face with sunglasses. It drove me crazy, especially since 8 ) on my list was “Flirt who dreams of f**king most of the women he has met on their kitchen tables.”  It was like WordPress was making a meta-comment, winking at me, the application insisting that it knew me better than I know myself.   Blogger or Typepad would never do that, or be so arrogant.

Eventually, I had to use 8 ) with a space after the number just to avoid 8)    Annoying.

Are you surprised that number 8 is NOT one of my three top characteristics?   This means that female bloggers can feel safe chatting with me again on IM, even if you are sitting in your kitchen, wearing your apron, typing on your laptop on the kitchen table while you are preparing dinner.



  1. Kate

    Neil, you can shut off the “automatic emoticon” feature in WordPress by going to SETTINGS (on the right hand side at the top of your dashboard), going to WRITING, and unchecking the “Convert emoticons like 🙂 and 😛 to graphics on display” box.

    I hope you sleep better tonight knowing that WordPress cannot pigeon-hole you so easily in the future.

    I’ve enjoyed reading about this “characteristics of Neil” project.

  2. ingrid

    I’ve never actually met anyone on their kitchen table before. Maybe if I did, I would dream of fucking them. Who knows? Life’s a mystery.

  3. Nancy

    I’ll forgive you this time, but next time, please ask before you use a photo of me in your post, mkay?

  4. Fear and Parenting in Las Vegas

    For your information, we met on my lap on the couch. The dining room table is for eating. Leave the more intimate stuff for the couch, eh. 8)

  5. Fancy

    Damn, I was hoping #8 was how you really felt about me. Yes, ME. Why does it always have to be about you?

    I know we haven’t technically “met”, but I like kitchen tables as much as the next girl…

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