Despite the recent posts about my gardening and love for ABBA, I just want to say for the record — I’m not gay. If I was gay, I would be completely proud of it. In fact, it might even be a blessing, so I wouldn’t have to deal with dating women.
But honestly, the shirtless guy seen above, featured on Cosmo’s website as some hottie, does absolutely nothing for me. What’s sexy about this guy? Who knows? His abs? I don’t even understand what women see in men. In my eyes, men mostly look dumb, especially when they are posing half-naked.
Straight men rarely “look” at other men as “objects of beauty.” Women are more appreciative of the attractiveness of their own gender. When I was first dating Sophia, she would sometimes ask me if I thought some woman on the street was pretty. At the time, I thought she was testing me, so I always answered, “Nah. You are the prettiest.”
Eventually, I learned that this wasn’t a ruse. She was genuinely interested in my opinion. She enjoyed looking at other women, as much as a man. She could see the beauty in a woman.
We could be watching “All My Children,” and Sophia will say, “Isn’t the new nurse at Pine Valley Hospital very pretty? I love her hair. Maybe I should get my hair done like that.”
I don’t remember ME ever asking Sophia if she thought some guy was sexy. Straight men don’t think about how other men look. They care about what car they drive.
As a experiment today, I went to Starbucks and surreptitiously checked out other men, trying to figure out if I could find a man “sexy” in a aesthetic, non-sexual way.
It didn’t work.
It didn’t matter if the guy was young or old, thin or fat, he was pretty much just a guy. There was one guy who walked into Starbucks wearing tight jeans and had a nice hard ass, but so what! It didn’t make me want to go on a date with him. And that whole “checking out a man’s package” when he’s wearing pants is a total myth. I tried it in Starbucks, and you can’t tell anything!
Anyway, I just wanted to report back to you.