Citizen of the Month

the writing and photography of Neil Kramer

Tag: premature ejaculation

Sex Advice for Men

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This week’s challenge on Poetry Thursday:  Write a poem about sex.

Sex Advice for Men
by Neil Kramer

Problems in the bedroom?
Your lady unfulfilled?
Ask me any question,
And get her garden tilled.

Question: 

“I really like this woman,
She’s sexy through and through.
I always climax way too fast,
What’s a man supposed to do?”

Answer: 

“That happens very often,
When relationships are new.
So, here’s a tried and true technique,
Passed down from Jew to Jew –”

You entertain thy woman,
With everything you know.
You tell amazing stories,
From Dickens, Eyre, and Poe.

You paint a lovely portrait,
You wear an artist’s frock,
You balance twenty dishes,
You buy her penny stock.

You tell her she is gorgeous,
You tell her that is why —
Your passion rose so suddenly,
And hit her in the eye.

You kick and do a swing dance,
You cook her Cream of Wheat,
You promise her gelato,
You say you’ll sail to Crete.

You feel her being curvy,
You lick her little toe,
You spread her arms behind her,
You move her high and low.

You be an opera singer,
You be a Shakespeare bard,
You pray to God repeatedly,
“Please let me stay real hard.”

Soon she’ll be all ready
Her heatbeat all a rush
She’ll want to climb atop you
Her body all aflush

Of course, by now you’re tired,
From all that work and fun,
You still might be excited
But your c**k might say “I’m done.”

Drug for Premature Ejaculation

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Concluding a sex-filled posting day with some interesting medical news

A new drug manufactured by Johnson & Johnson designed to help men with treatment for premature ejaculation has passed its first test.  The Wall Street Journal reported on Tuesday that a major study presented during the American Urological Association annual meeting in San Antonio suggested the drug dapoxetine could help men suffering from premature ejaculation by delaying orgasm.

The drug supposedly helped men to increase their ejaculation time significantly — from less than one minute to more than three minutes!  Can there be nothing that medical science cannot solve with a pill?  Couples everywhere can now live it up for another two minutes.

Writing in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, the researchers said they timed ejaculations by giving stopwatches to the sex partners of more than 1,500 men.

Did they ever think that maybe all this premature ejaculation was occurring to these poor men because their partners were in bed holding stopwatches?  You try it.

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