Citizen of the Month

the writing and photography of Neil Kramer

Dreaming About Right Field

Valentine’s Day was now over. I went to sleep late. In the middle of the night, I had a dream. At first, it seemed inspirational — maybe about love? taking chances? — and then it turned into a nightmare.

I just got a job with the LA Dodgers farm team in Florida (I think they are in Arizona now, right?), which is pretty good in this bad economy. It was our first game of the season. Tommy Lasorda (!) gave us a rousing speech, saying there was no room for defeat. It was difficult for me not to laugh during his over-the-top statements about the importance of our mission. I was sitting next to a Christine F. from elementary school, who was now an attractive attorney. In fact the whole team consisted of friends from my past, some still twelve years old, and others now grown up.

“Kramer, get in there!’ said Lasorda. “You’re right field.”

I went out onto the baseball field. I was the last one out. Players were throwing baseballs back and forth. The grass was bright green, and the sunshine was bothering my eyes. I had no idea where to go. I was not sure WHICH side was right field. Was it like stage left? Was it the side I was facing, or from the POV of the field facing home plate? I started to panic. Steve W., someone I have not seen since sleepaway camp years ago, was playing first base. He was always a good athlete.

“Neil, take off your winter coat and winter hat. Are you nuts? You can’t play wearing that!”

I woke up with a headache.


  1. Just realized — mother is in Florida, talked about going to see Chicago Cubs in July with someone on Twitter, and Danny’s latest post is about him looking up an old schoolmate that he liked, and discovering that she is an attorney in Chicago. It is cool how elements of the day work their way into dreams.

  2. Maybe you just need to get laid? (That’s not an offer, I’m just sayin’ …!)

  3. If it makes you feel any better, I had a dream last night that you were having an affair with my mother-in-law. I’m not kidding! I walked into a restaurant and there the two of you were at a back table having a very intimate tete-a-tete. Oy! What does it mean, Dr. Kramer? Or should I say…Papa?

  4. Coulda been worse. You could have been out there naked.

  5. Really good point AnnieH. It can always be worse.

  6. It really is interesting how the strands from our day can weave themselves into a dream that leaves you shaking your head.

    Did you at least have your glove? Because that could have been the real nightmare! :-)

  7. I could see that, Danny, except that Neil would be obliviously playing with his iPod, looking for Twitter messages from his harem of mommbloggers, while your MIL flirted with the cute Latin waiter.

  8. so THAT is where my coat went

  9. I nightmared last night too. Background: After twelve years of work, my former partner and I have developed a supportive friendship. Dream: Brian, former partner, invited me to a drinks party. He wanted to introduce me to a woman who had caught his eye, but he didn’t tell me this. I left with her number and her lip gloss layered over mine.

    When I roused from sleep, I was driven to confess. He’s not speaking to me at the moment. I feel like crying.

  10. My Tommy Lasorda dreams involve the two of us splitting a 4ft. Italian sub with extra banana peppers and me translating his rants in Spanish to Valenzuela. Valenzuela is eating a burrito.

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