the writing and photography of Neil Kramer


This is going to be one of those weird posts where I am going to reveal something about myself by showing you my original post that I deleted, and then explain why I deleted it.

Original post, 6AM:

I know most women just want their man ready and willing 24 hours a day, but sometimes even we aren’t in the mood. Normally, I like to get down and dirty with you and reveal all, but I had a really good therapy session yesterday, and it’s still simmering in my brain, like a pot of stew. Would it be OK if we just cuddle today?

Note from Neil, 6:06AM:

After pressing the publish button, I quickly unpublished it. Why? Do you really want the honest answer? Because I want you to think that I am ready and willing 24 hours a day. Isn’t that a man’s job?

Therapist’s Inner Voice, 6:10AM

Why do you feel the urge to talk about cuddling? Do you feel the need to reveal weakness?

Neil’s Talking Penis, 6:12AM

Stop being a wimp and proving that you are non-threatening. You saw her on Flickr. If Ms. Blogger XXXX didn’t live east of XXXX, you wouldn’t mind f***ing her on the table right now.

Therapist’s Inner Voice, 6:14AM

Why did you feel the urge to write that? They know you have a c**k. You don’t need to remind them.

Note from Neil, 6:20AM

I really just wanted to cuddle until I was ready to talk about therapy.

Neil’s Talking Penis, 6:21AM

There’s only one therapy that will take care of that.

Therapist’s Inner Voice, 6:223AM

You don’t have to make jokes all the time.

Note from Neil, 6:25AM

I wasn’t.


  1. alissa

    I adore those sessions! The ones that stick with you for a few days after. Cuddling is definitely in order. As is comfort food.

  2. margaret

    mmm, stew, but let go, cuddling makes some of us feel trapped

  3. Los Angelista

    Is this your way of telling us not to buy you a blow up doll this holiday season?

  4. Rattling the Kettle

    I’m with the penis (that sounds wrong) – a good schtupping will fix everything.

    At least for a few minutes. After which, you can go back to stewing. Win-win!

  5. sizzle

    i’m with alissa- comfort food and cuddling. stat!

  6. Kyra

    Hmm and why can’t they go together? Not that I’m not always generally up for a sweep off the kitchen table and give new meaning to the words “place settings”, but the cudding is always the part that you can’t do without.

    Cuddling rules. 🙂 And cuddling with Chocolate is even better.

  7. Finn

    Cuddling is wonderful. Cuddling after sex is even better. And cuddling after sex with chocolate may be as close to heaven as I’m gonna get.

  8. churlita

    Sex, cuddling,chocolate? Sigh…Sigh, that’s all.

  9. wendy

    I’m not much of a cuddler. That reveals my own issues.

    That’s what I like so much about you Neil..You don’t always lead with humour..Veiled truths here..makes me wonder just what’s behind that veil???….

  10. Guilty Secret

    Haaaaaaa! Oh man, I do love men. I can’t for the life of me understand them, but I do love them 😉

  11. Dagny

    You’re planning on doing this therapy thing for a really long time, aren’t you?

  12. Bec

    Mmmm… cuddling… I’ll be back…

  13. MammaLoves

    It was hard enough to follow along when there were just two voices. The therapist though, that’s just brilliant.

  14. Inarticulate Fumblings

    Right, now try that with TWO men… difficult.

  15. OMSH

    I like to cuddle after.
    Scratch that.
    No, I don’t. THEN, I like to sleep.

    I’m still trying to figure out where my estrogen went to hide.

  16. slynne

    This is one of the most honest, true, and humorous things I have read in forever. Thanks.

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