This weekend, Sophia and I went to an upscale Newport Beach hotel for our anniversary.  As you know, we are separated.  So, why are we celebrating our anniversary?  Hey, so we’re separated.  We might end up divorced.  We might end up staying married, and finding true happiness.  Whatever the case, we still love each other.   We loved each other enough a few years back to have participated in that expensive mega-ceremony on October 13th which made our love legal.   So, why not celebrate that love… and that special day? And since we have an offbeat marriage, why not make our anniversary weekend unique in its own way,  a microcosm of our years together as a couple?

Our marriage is about companionship.    During our anniversary, we tried to recapture those elements that have kept us together for so long.  We attended a concert and a provocative piece of theater in Laguna Beach.  We played cards.  We stayed in bed and watched TV.  We ate Italian food in a tiny, romantic restaurant in Laguna Beach, sitting at a special table by the window.

Our marriage is about overcoming the hurdles of two strong individuals learning to compromise.   During our anniversary,  we kept things “real” by making sure we had at least one really nasty fight.  Our fight on Saturday night was a pretty good one, a disagreement about — something too ridiculous to talk about — in which “f**K you!” was said at least fifteen times, where I crushed an empty coffee cup and threw it onto the floor of the car, and where Sophia threatened to drive back to Redondo Beach, leaving me stranded at a Mobil gas station.

Our marriage is about humor.   Without a sense a humor, a couple might as well give up any chance of surviving.   During our anniversary, we had a lot of laughs.   After our big fight, we resolved to have a good time for the rest of the weekend, and we did.  We always find something to laugh about, such as this “Sopranos”-inspired artwork we noticed at some art gallery.


Our marriage is about acceptance.   During our anniversary, we went shopping.  Although part of me wondered why in the world Sophia NEEDED to buy another hat at this overpriced hat store, I’m glad I got this ribbon hat for her, because Sophia looks pretty cute in it.


Our marriage is about passion.   The hotel’s grounds had both ping pong tables and shuffleboard courts.   During our anniversary, we went head to head.  Sophia surprisingly beat me in the ancient sport of ping pong, slamming the ball past me for the final point.  I retaliated in shuffleboard, my years of experience from my youth at Jewish resorts in the Catskills helping me show her who’s on top.   After the games, we both took cold showers.

Our marriage is about emotion.  How can a couple not be sentimental about the good times together?  During our anniversary, we stumbled upon a couple getting married near the beach.  This made us reminisce about our own special day.



Like our marriage, our anniversary weekend was bumpy, chaotic, creative, neurotic, irritating, inspirational, sentimental, sexy, nasty, loving, and fun.