Last weekend was the Blogher women bloggers’ conference in Santa Clara, California.  A couple of my new online friends, such as Lizriz and Nichelle, went to the conference — and from all accounts, it was very inspirational.  One of the hottest topics of conversation at Blogher was about how hard it is to get into the old-boy’s network of the Technorati Top 100 websites.  I didn’t realize that blogging was already becoming the same as everything else, with a power structure and leaders of industry (except for the fact that it’s a lame industry and nobody makes money at it).  I know as a man, it’s easy for me to call Cory Doctorow of Boing Boing on his cell phone and schmooze him into giving me another link on his site, but I don’t like to take advantages of my gender.  For women, it must be especially difficult.

Until today, I didn’t realize that many people have dreams of getting into the Technorati 100 top sites.  People thought it was weird when I revealed that my first clicks of the day are always the single women on my blogroll.   What’s wrong with that?  I’m a guy!  It’s natural.   My female readers come in all shapes, sizes, and colors — sort of like a real life Dove Campaign for Real Beauty — I even found out today that one of them is a lesbian.  I don’t discriminate.  In contrast, today I read about some bloggers that stack their blogroll with "top sites" just to feed off the aura.  Now that’s a hundred times more creepier than loving the sweet words of a good woman. 

Here in the Los Angeles world of celebrity blogging, there is a lot of jealousy going around now that blogger Mark Lisanti of Defamer.com got his own puff piece in Sunday’s Los Angeles Times Calendar section.

For some the drug of choice is nicotine. For others, it’s marijuana or gambling, alcohol or shopping. For Mark Lisanti, the one-man band behind Hollywood’s website du jour, Defamer.com, the addiction is hits — page views, computer eyeballs — from the working men and women whom he’s distracted from their jobs with his pithy running commentary about celebrity hubris, the multitude of foibles that grow in Hollywood like tumbleweeds on the prairie.

When I read the following, I could almost hear the collective groan all the way from Blogher:

According to Technorati, a San Francisco-based company that ranks blogs according to the number of people linking to them in the last 90 days, Defamer was recently the 69th most popular blog out of an estimated 14 million blogs worldwide.

How does this "Eastside hipster" — as the Times called him — do it?  How is he #69 (even his number is sexy) and the rest of us are up in the bleachers with 14 million other losers?

Save your money.  You don’t need any fancy "blogging conferences" to help you succeed.  The answer is right in front of you face.

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Here is Mark Lisanti.  Look how he isn’t smiling, despite the fact that Defamer is about silly celebrity gossip.  Like a successful high fashion model, the trick is to never smile.

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This is a recent photo of me.  Look at that stupid grin.  What am I smiling about?  Why do I look so ridiculous?  This is the photo of a man who will never get close to the Technorati 100. 

Update  August 3:   In reaction to the Technorati 100, Jason Calacanis is starting a "Blog 500."  Now, there’s going to be more ass-kissing to do.