http://www.citizenofthemonth.com Neil Kramer is a writer in Los Angeles. Citizen of the Month is his blog. Make yourself at home. Wed, 14 May 2008 13:03:19 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en I love imaginary Paris. I love the cafes, the art, the fashion, but mostly I thrive here because this is the famed city of French existentialism and moral relativism. I am comfortable here using the $5000 that I found in that imaginary wallet yesterday. Sure, I COULD ... http://www.citizenofthemonth.com/2008/05/14/imaginary-paris-on-5000-a-day/ Let's imagine I'm walking down the block and I find a wallet on the ground.  I open it up.  Inside, I see a driver's license with an address.  The wallet also contains $5000 dollars.  What am I going to do?  I'm going to contact this person and return the wallet, with the ... http://www.citizenofthemonth.com/2008/05/13/the-morality-of-the-lost-wallet/ I've been sleeping in the living room for the last few weeks.  On Saturday, I woke up a 3AM and I couldn't handle it anymore.  I'm a man, with manly needs.  I climbed the stairs to the bedroom.  I was naked.  I pushed open the door, my body tense with ... http://www.citizenofthemonth.com/2008/05/12/hug/ (typical mommyblogger) “God couldn't be everywhere, so he created mothers”  - Jewish proverb http://www.citizenofthemonth.com/2008/05/10/i-salute-you-mothers/ Are my current posts so boring that everyone seems to be reading my entries from... 2006?  First I received that nice email from the Sun-Maid raisin girl about a post from that year.  Today, I received a different type of response to a "humorous" post I wrote in May 2006 titled "Seven Reasons to ... http://www.citizenofthemonth.com/2008/05/08/mommy-dearest/ They paved paradise and put up a parking lot. But people were pissed at losing paradise. So they paved the parking lot and planted paradise. But people now had no place to park at paradise. So they raised taxes, spent 6 billion dollars, and built a light-rail system to paradise. But now any shmuck could get in, and ... http://www.citizenofthemonth.com/2008/05/07/they-paved-paradise/ I've been depressed. And lonely. And needy. And horny. And looking for love in all the wrong places. And pissed off at mommybloggers for naming every other blog MommySomething. And finding Twitter superficial. And I have high cholesterol. Is it any wonder that I haven't blogged all week? Do you really want ... http://www.citizenofthemonth.com/2008/05/07/raisin-cain/ Greetings to you, the lucky finder of this golden ticket, from Mr. Willy Wonka!  I shake you warmly by the hand!  Tremendous things are in store for you! Many wonderful surprises await you!  For now, I do invite you to come to my factory and be my guest for one ... http://www.citizenofthemonth.com/2008/05/04/the-pure-imagination-of-the-golden-ticket/ I might as well finish up a week of blogging posts, with a post about blogging -- Yesterday, I made fun of those badges that we all put on our blogs announcing some award or honor. Today, I'm thinking of offering my own badge for you to put on a ... http://www.citizenofthemonth.com/2008/05/02/internet-smog-check/ I'm a bit constricted by my blog at times.  I look around and see that most of the well-known personal blogs revolve around that blogger's day-to-day life.   I know that is obvious.  I'm just noting that these writers rarely deviate from their theme.  They use their blog as a journal ... http://www.citizenofthemonth.com/2008/05/01/just-thinking-about-writing/