the writing and photography of Neil Kramer

Typical Middle East News Story Comment Section

@David Gold, Queens, NYC

Why should we prosecute the filmmaker simply for making a film, even if it is a badly produced one about Islam? Don’t we have free speech in this country? Do we want to throw the makers of South Park in prison for making fun of Mormons. The Muslims needs to grow up and not act like a bunch of babies when their prophet is mocked in a stupid movie.

@Ahmad Khan, Beirut, Lebanon

When you say “The Muslims,” David, who exactly are you referring to? Don’t you realize that accounts put active participation in the anti-film protests at between 0.001 and 0.007% of the world’s 1.5 billion Muslims รขโ‚ฌโ€œ a tiny fraction of those who marched for democracy in the Arab spring. Most Muslims are peace-loving and have no interest in this stupidity. The Newsweek cover story on “Muslim Rage” was pandering to the lowest common denominator. The Muslim world does not hold the American government or its citizens responsible for acts of ONE irresponsible Israeli filmmaker, and the super-rich Jewish financiers who helped back the project.

@David Gold, Queens, NYC

You should know, Ahmad, that despite your glee in pinning this on the Jews, that the filmmaker was actually an Egyptian-born Christian, and was not financed by any “super-rich” Jewish financiers. Sorry.

@Matt Rallington, Waco, Texas

Oh, so it is the fault of the Christians, David! So typical of a Jew to turn in his Christian brother as the guilty party. It has been that way since Judas pointed his finger at Jesus, the Lord, Our God.

@Ahmad Khan, Beirut, Lebanon

I so agree with you, Matt, my Christian friend. Never trust a Jew. Look at how they stole the land from the Palestinians.

@Matt Rallington, Waco, Texas

Actually, Ahmed, I am a firm supporter of the State of Israel. The Bible says that only through the Hebrews will there be a War to End All Wars, causing the End of Days and the return of our Savior, who will then destroy all who don’t believe in him.

@David Gold, Queens, NYC

Including the Jews, Matt?

@Matt Rallington, Waco, Texas

Oh, definitely the Jews, David. You will live in Hell forever.

@David Gold, Queens, NYC

I see. Well, even though you hate the Jewish people, Matt, I respect your support of the State of Israel.

@Rivers Stillman-Thompson, Berkeley, CA

I’m an atheist, David, and I can’t understand how Jews can circumcise their sons like savages. This primitive practice should be banned.

@Ahmad Khan, Beirut, Lebanon

Actually, Rivers, Muslims also circumcise their boys and I find your views abhorent.

@David Gold, Queens, NYC

Right on, Ahmed. We agree on one thing. Oh, and our love of falafel.

@Rivers Stillman-Thompson, Berkeley, CA

I like falafel, also, David, but only if it is organic.

@Matt Rallington, Waco, Texas

WTF kind of name is Rivers, Rivers? Are you a dude or a chick?

@Rivers Stillman-Thompson, Berkeley, CA

Gender has no meaning to me, Matt. Every individual contain both genders.

@David Gold, Queens, NYC

What a fruitcake! Right, Ahmad?

@Ahmad Khan, Beirut, Lebanon

Yes, David. Definitely. ๐Ÿ™‚

@Father Brian McMasters, Cleveland, Ohio

Hey, everyone! Are there any young boys on here?

@Matt Rallington, Waco, Texas

Father Brian, you are on the WRONG FORUM!

@David Gold, Queens, NYC

Neil, that was a really inappropriate punch line for this blog post.

@Ahmad Khan, Beirut, Lebanon

I don’t know about that, David. At least it wasn’t about Mohammed!

10 Comments

  1. sarah gilbert

    Your portrayal of the commenters is far too gentlemanly. not a “no offense but” or “moron” in the whole exchange! and not a single mention of Barack’s middle name. (Did I tell you that I once set a spam filter to trigger every time someone type the word “Hussein”? It was very effective!)

  2. The Honourable Husband

    If you want to become part of the commentariat, Neil, you’ll need to remember that “abhorrent” has two r’s.

    This is so true, it’s almost plagiarism. Except that the thread is too short.

  3. Lydia

    It took me a minute to realize this was fictional! I thought this was both funny and incredibly sad- just like the real comments on a middle eastern news story would be.

  4. Irish Gumbo

    I was going to say “Praise the lord!” that at least the punch line wasn’t about Mohammed, but then I got confused about which lord to praise. Is there a crib sheet somewhere, or like a “Deities for Dummies” booklet?

    Excellent satire, Neil. I am learning a thing or two!

  5. V-Grrrl @ Compost Studios

    Deities for Dummies? LMAO!

    I LOVE this post. It’s hilarious. Should be on Salon.

  6. Juli

    You are such a gifted storyteller. This post reminded me of Naguib Mahfouz.

  7. Diana Mahmoud

    So funny, but also a little sad because it’s not so far off from the truth.

  8. Sew Contractor

    Though the story was made for a film, I think we do need to respect different religions. We can create a movie that nobody will get hurt and that would only speaks about the truth.

  9. Paintergirl

    I agree with Diana. You’ve hit it perfectly. Now for the movie…can’t we all try to ignore stupid things. Allow people to create, but the more people talk about this movie, the more airtime it gets. Damien Hirst would kill for this much publicity.

  10. Delfin Joaquin Paris III

    Priest rape always makes me laugh.

    It just does.

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