the writing and photography of Neil Kramer

I Don’t Care About You

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Note: You notice how this post is sort of a throw-a-way post? Should I even bother to post nonsense like this? I was thinking of calling these posts “Expendable Posts” that I would publish, and then just delete in a few days. If my blog is supposedly my “calling card” for my writing, why do I want to have crap cluttering things up? But at the same time, it is kind of fun posting crap. I think something really fucked up my idea of blogging about six months ago, around the time I read Queen of Spain’s post about “The Business of Mommyblogging.” Until then, my blog was like a child’s sandbox, and I was just having fun. And then, it felt like I was Dorothy seeing the real Wizard of Oz. Most of you had “reasons” for being online — branding, money, connections, advancing your writing, corporate sponsorship. I began to feel like I was just playing with myself. That I was a still child and everyone was now an adult. The only possible “practical” reason to continue blog was related to writing, but where does this leave moronic posts like this one?

Of course, there is the community aspect of blogging? But what is my community? Some bloggers, especially the parent bloggers, frequently wrote posts addressing each other, sometimes even getting annoyed if a non-parent commented on an issue related to children.

I’m not a parent.

Should I be searching for my own unique community? And what is that community? Writers? Do I really want to become one of those who only reads “the literary blogs” and pooh pooh those who ONLY write blogs about their lives, but without the cleverness of a poet? I know plenty of people who are exactly like that.

Besides, half the time, I don’t really write anyway. I just blog funny stuff.

Humor bloggers?

Nah, not funny all the time.

Today, I’m not even writing at all. I’m putting up a video.

What do you think of the idea of “expendable posts” — ones you might publish just for the hell of it, or you just want to rant, like this, and then delete it afterwards so your “brand” doesn’t get diluted or you just don’t want the post sitting up there forever? Is that being dishonest, in your view? On the other hand, is it better to steer away from writing shitty posts like this — out of fear being seen as a lesser writer? C’mon, we all have shitty posts in us!

Maybe, twice a month, I will intentionally write a really bad post on some lame topic, just for the expression of it, and then delete it. Is that against the rules?

You don’t really have to comment here. I’m deleting this post tomorrow.

36 Comments

  1. Poppy

    “Is that against the rules?”

    What rules? Your blog your rules.

  2. anna

    I write shitty posts all the time. For one thing, I maintain there is a market for it.

    But yeah, how can you write something good every day? Not possible. But maybe you write something that keeps you thinking, or gets a conversation started, that turns into something at some point? The good thing about blogging is that there is a feeling that you need to post, it makes me feel like I have to press “submit,” even when what I write is self-indulgent, flowery, tripe.

  3. solessence

    What’s my motivation? I wrote about fish trapped in an aquaduct. If that isn’t expendable…

  4. chez beziat

    Your blog is the perfect blog. Well, the perfect “type” of blog anyway. No branding, no higher focus, just fun and fluid. Just yours.

    I treat mine as a place where I just post what I want with no plan of it having to be important ever. Otherwise I would have deleted it a long time ago and gotten a life. Or more of one anyway.

  5. Kathy

    We should start a community of niche-less bloggers.

    Someone left a comment on my site a few weeks ago, saying she didn’t know I wasn’t a mom, as if being a female blogger, well, I must be a mom. (Unless I referred to my cat as “my baby” a few too many times, confusing the few readers I have.)

    Yeah, I know the feeling too well.

  6. balou

    I’m leaving a shitty comment since you’re deleting this shitty post tomorrow. I think 99% of my posts are shitty so I guess that’s my “blog purpose” – to be shitty. I should rename it to “Shitty Shitty Bang Bang”. 😉

  7. Caitlinator

    I started my blog because it seemed like the cool thing to do. Then I wanted to be a blogstar. That didn’t happen, so then I quit. And then I missed it, so I started writing again. But it sucked. So I quit again. And then I realized that really? I don’t write for me. And the people who come are just looking for updates into the life of me. I don’t know why. But somehow not trying to be something I (and my blog) are not is satisfying. It kinda depends on what you want the blog to be. If you want it to be a calling card, craft it that way. If you want it to be your sandbox, we’ll still come play here. There’s no right or wrong answer – it’s what works for you.

  8. patois

    I’m supposed to have a brand? What other rules are being hidden from me? And are they only hidden from me? Does everyone else know the rules and either play by them or haughtingly ignore them? I’m so tired of being left out.

  9. Stacey

    Every time I write a serious post (like today) I feel like I’m cheating whatever readers I have because they want to be entertained. Really, is it ok to write posts just for me?

  10. Lori

    It’s your blog and you should be able to post whatever you want to on your blog. And, since it’s your blog, you have the right to delete my comment today. Or tomorrow. Or Thursday. Whatever. I’ll still come to your sandbox any day!

  11. Heatherly

    I think that you should keep the expendable posts up there. As an amateur writer, I like to think that I have to get the crappy posts out before the good stuff comes to you. And, even if you don’t see it, these posts are great too!!

  12. TMC

    Deleting posts might get you more “what happened?!” comments and questions than it’s worth. Besides, not every post needs to be a masterpiece. I put up a picture of my sleeping dog yesterday. So what?! (though in my defense I’m doing NaBlo for October so I had to post something.)

    If this blog is about your Brand, but you still wanted a place to post all-booty, all-the-time videos, you could always have another blog. Can’t say that I’d follow that one but still, you could have it if you wanted. If it’s rules you crave, I’m sure we could find some under whose pressure you could squirm. Some folks need that.

  13. Twenty Four At Heart

    I’d keep the expendable posts.
    I’m playing in the sandbox too and I think it’s fun. If I’m having fun, why not? Also, if it’s the same as playing with myself? Well, is that a problem?

  14. Wendy

    I’m having a hard time finding my “category” too. I’m a mom, but write about way more than just the kids. I, for one, would love to have you comment on my blog. Some parents can really be snobs about it. Asshats.

    Who says we have to have a category anyway? Didn’t blogging originally start as just life-blogging? Just be yourself and stop worrying about it being your calling card or whatever. Anyone can pound out drivel, but even your posts to trash are good and entertaining. Don’t delete these. It gives a peek into your head, and I know I’m not the only reader who enjoys that in bloggers.

    And by the way, you did more than post a video today.

  15. ingrid

    I think your trying to put too much structure to something that doesn’t require any.

    Let your subversive self go. If you’re an anarchist in no other area of your life, I would say, it’s ok to be one on your blog.

    There are no rules.

    xo

  16. Fancy

    I don’t consider myself a humor blogger, a mommy blogger, a political blogger, or a writer blogger. I’m an eclectic blogger and I write or throw up a link or a video about any darn thing that crosses my mind. And I like it like that!

  17. Black Hockey Jesus

    Frankly Neil, I don’t give a crap what you do. I’m just going to light a cigarette, look through you, and act like you never wrote this post.

  18. maggie, dammit

    Don’t delete it.

    And don’t change your blog ONE. BIT.

  19. AnnieH(the other Annie)

    I recently heard an author on an NPR program say,”Blogging is crack for writers.” I think she’s right, damn her insightful reasoning. Delete away, babe..it’s only vanity going up in smoke.

  20. better safe than sorry

    i write lots of crap, simply write it and then never hit publish, let alone worry about deleting it later.
    i have no idea why i even have a blog.
    your post today, on your green blog, AWESOME!

  21. Kerri Anne

    The way you nearly over-think everything is actually quite charming, and reminds me a lot of Chris. All of that to say: I think you are great, and you don’t have to be a parent, or a non-parent to be great. You just have to be you, as hokey as that will always inevitably sound. And expendable posts are just fine. Sometimes nonsense makes the most sense anyway.

  22. sassy

    Haha, that’s great. I got cut down once for commenting on a parent blog. I was like, hey, I’m infertile people, have a little tact. Never went back. I guess it’s high schoolish to exclude others in order to have your own group identity. I like your idea of expendable posts, why not? Reminds me of the time I dressed up as a tampon for halloween. Not very popular at the time, but boy did I get a lot of laughs…

  23. vodkamom

    I think everyone should be able to add “comics” once in a while. It’s just cool to try new stuff. And if once in a while it sucks, who really gives a crap? You know we’ll all come back. We’ve already become addicted. (damn you.)

  24. vodkamom

    i mean THANK you. that’s what i meant. yeah.

  25. cog

    I figure, why settle for expendable posts? I have an expendable blog, yo.

    and proudly so.

  26. churlita

    I use my blog as impetus to write everyday. Some days the posts turn out to be pretty interesting, and others are crap. If I only wrote when I thought I had something to say, I’d eventually not write at all. It would be too much pressure. Think of your blog as being just for you and try to get over the people pleasing or the labeling of your blog. Have fun with it, whether you have something to say or not.

  27. Diane Mandy

    You can’t delete posts if we leave comments. That would be a greater sin than unfollowing on Twitter.

  28. gorillabuns

    I do have to say, most of my posts are expendable. What I find even more interesting is the more expendable the post is, the more comments I receive. If I write anything full of substance? **crickets** I find the whole bloggerdom very odd.

    Secretly, I like receiving comments from people who don’t have children. Their comments make me feel like there might be more to me than you know, spawning.

  29. Kathy

    What I find even more interesting is the more expendable the post is, the more comments I receive.

    Same here. Odd phenomenon, that.

  30. apathy lounge

    Even the Mommy Bloggers drop back and punt the occasional post about their dog or a random conversation they had at the dry cleaners. It’s not all beer and skittles. I started my blog three years ago as a way to keep my hand in the writing process as freelance opportunities in my city disappeared like the last few cupcakes at a Weight Watcher’s meeting. Am I further along? Not really. My kids are so old that I can’t even really be called a Mommy Blogger anymore. I’ve begun to suspect my own motives for sticking around…I mean…unlike some people out there I can’t post a picture of my new shoes and garner 826 comments. It just aint happening. But what if I leave? Then reading everyone’s blogs will make me feel even more left out that I usually do. All this to say…we don’t care what you write, Neil. Just write.

  31. Anissa@Hope4Peyton

    Seriously, my blog is so not in the norm. I’m shocked every day that I have a reader. I don’t even know if I’d read what I wrote some days. It doesn’t always have to be deep, funny or profound…it just has to be honestly you. Keep bringing us the citizen and we’ll keep coming back.

  32. vodkamom

    Hey- i thought you were deleting this.

  33. PAPA

    One day I’ll probably delete my entire blog and start over. Sad thing is it will probably be an accident.

  34. Neil

    Vodkamom — not ready yet. Have nothing new yet.

  35. V-Grrrl

    I’m just commenting to let you know I don’t care about you either, and I proved it by waiting days to comment on the post you told us not to comment on.

    I am NOT INTERESTED in you, Neil. Not at all. I am the Mistress of Attraction.

  36. tabulyogang

    haha, and almost 4 years has gone by. And look at you(post) you’re still here. Shit or not you’ve managed to stay for such a long time baby.

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