Hey, God, what’s going on? Give us a break already!
On Friday, Sophia’s surgeon called. An MRI test showed that something they’ve been watching for a year is still there, and at this point, another biopsy just cannot be trusted any longer, and a full surgery needs to be done to remove it. There is a 50/50 chance that is is cancerous.
WTF? Are you pissed at some blog post I wrote? Are you mad that we skipped over most of the Haggadah during the Passover Seder so we could eat dinner?
Well, we’re tired of this. Even the characters on “All My Children” get a break every once in a while from their soap opera drama.
Wasn’t it just three weeks ago that Sophia’s mother was in the hospital? Wasn’t it two weeks ago that Sophia had an exploratory surgery, because the medication that she was taking to prevent a breast cancer recurrence was suspected of causing another type of cancer?! Why would you play with our minds, like the producers of American Idol, by letting us celebrate the good results of that surgery, only to learn that there’s a plot twist a few moments later?
I have some news for you, God. Even the storyline is getting old. Didn’t Sophia already go through a breast cancer surgery and endless treatments three years ago? The recovery took such a long time and was very painful. And I really hate seeing Sophia in pain, you know? I love her. I really love her, despite whatever kind of crazy married/separated relationship we have going on. This news makes me very mad. And it makes Sophia very depressed.
Eh, God, you know what? I’m not even in the mood to talk to you right now. That’s right, I’m showing you the hand. I’m busy. We can negotiate later.
Right now, I want to talk to the readers of “Citizen of the Month.” If you have been a long time reader of this blog, you know Sophia. She is my real-life Lucy Ricardo — funny, wacky, kind, sometimes overly-assertive woman — who I write about on these pages all the time. She’s the strongest woman I know, but she’s not that strong right now.
She needs some serious cheering up. She knows many of you already through emails, comments, and our trip to Portland. She actually asks me at dinner what is going on in YOUR lives, as if we are gossiping about friends in the neighborhood.
The surgery is on May 9th. So, send her a card. Send a joke. Send her a message. Send a song. Send a voice email. Send a webcam greeting. Send a postcard. Send Sophia some TLC:
Neil Kramer
P.O. Box 475
Redondo Beach, CA, 90277
” I love her. I really love her, despite whatever kind of crazy married/separated relationship we have going on.”
Neil, it’s 3:55 a.m. in Toronto, and I’ve just finished reading your latest post.
Those quoted lines made me cry.
G-d willing I’ll find Sophia a very sweet card and will write her a very sweet message, and I hope that the Canadian-U.S. postal service will do a damn, fine job of getting my card to her on time!
In the meantime, give her a warm hug from me…and then tickle her till she gives in to your demands!
Mucho love going out to Sophia. One thing after another, eh?
i’ll send her my prayers with this comment right now.
Darling Sophia,
I am holding you in my thoughts right here, right now, and for as long as it takes. And for Neil, the same.
From Tamarika
Sophia, keep your head up and hang in there. Honestly, I’ve had hell befall me, and I’ve managed to keep myself sane. Well, somewhat…I think a wee bit of insanity helped me cope
I’m hoping it’s not cancerous. They’ll successfully remove it and you’ll be on the way to complete remission and recovery.
Buckets and buckets of love and hope being sent your way from Seoul!
I am so sorry to learn Sophia has had such serious health problems to deal with. I hope this is just an exploratory thing and that all will be well.
I was very sad to read your post Neil. I can’t imagine how scared and frustrated you both must be right now. I will be sending Sophia lots of positive, healthy thoughts.
so sorry for both you and Sophia. I send positive thoughts and recommend funny movies for laughter as good medicine…
Anger is good, Neil. There is no punishment in what is befalling us, otherwise how can people believe in a loving Creator, that would make no sense.
Anger is energy, let’s use it against anything that is worth being destroyed, like bad cells.
Let’s all ask for God to grant a refuah shelemah to Sophia.
Sophia is such a giving person, now she is on the receiving end, I wish her all the best. My heart goes to her, because I am a depressive person, so I can feel what she is experiencing when she is depressed.
I can tell her that it is a very hard struggle to battle the negative feelings, and that all the positive that is in life is still there even when we cannot feel it no more, it is still there, it is our choice to acknowledge it or not.
I pray that you both get strength, instead of the break you are asking for, nobody wants to be broken, ask for the right thing, Neiloshka, you were very right to ask us all to send something positive to Sophia, we will, be this is what friends are for, virtual and real, a long chain of hope, and laughs, as Sophia needs a lot of laughing moment to be prepared for the surgery and go there in the best of spirits ever.
Good sleep, good laughs, healthy eating, arnica.
You take care of the cleaning up, the providing laughs and lifting up. Let’s face the fear, we are all afraid now but we are not going to sit back, an army of internet friends can block any harm to a loving person such as Sophia.
I’m sorry the two of you are going through this. I’m glad the earlier exploratory surgery yielded good results, and I’m betting on this one to do the same. Hey, if they’ve been watching this for a year, it can’t be too aggressive, even if it is cancerous, and I’m counting on it NOT being cancerous.
I will be praying for you two. Peace…
Don’t be afraid, Sophia. It sounds like you have some proactive, aggressive doctors and as V-Grrrl said, if they’ve been monitoring it this closely….
The date is on my calendar and you will be in my head, in my heart, and in my prayers.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Um. That didn’t quite format the way it was supposed to. Oh well, I kinda like it. Infinite hugs and kisses to Sophia. (And to you too, Neil)
You’re both in my thoughts and prayers. Just remember to breathe, both of you. And lean on each other.
xoxoxo
can i send myself?
big bigbigbig hugs for my friend sophia.
more love is on the way… STAT!
thinking of you both. XO
Lots of prayers coming your way and a card too. (Neil, if you want any alternative ideas email me privately)
Gracious that’s an awful big challenge to be facing right now! Sophia will certainly be in my thoughts and prayers!
Lots of love and good vibes to you both!
Shit. I’m so sorry! This even got me to come out of my Flickr shell to comment.
Sophia is strong and amazing and her humor and matter-of-fact outlook will help her tremendously. Thinking of both of you and will definitely get off my ass and do something for her.
xo
Fuck! I’m sorry to hear this rotten news. Sending lots and lots of good vibes . . .
I feel for you guys. This is terrible news. I have you, and especially Sophia, in my thoughts.
Sucks.
My thoughts are with you both… my focus is on a well, happy, vibrant, full-capacity Sophia.
Many healing thoughts for Sophia and support for you both … love, JP
Shit.
I’m so sorry.
Will send a card and best hugs.
God loves you both and you are so lucky to have each other. Life can be a rough ride. Sophia and you need to hold on tight and hopefully it will all be better soon.
Sophia and Neil you are in my prayers and even though we have never met, I care about you both.
{{{Mom hugs}}}
Aw, Fuck! You’re both in my thoughts.
So sorry to hear your news Neil. I’m thinking of both of you.
I’m so sorry to read this news. All my best, Sophia, really.
Wow, what a 1-2-3 punch.
I’m sorry to hear this news, but I KNOW that you and Sophia will get through this together. Hang in there and know that the whole blog world is thinking of you and sending all kinds of powerful mojo Sophia’s way.
So G_d, could you pick(on)someone else for a while? Not that I think you’re paranoid or anything, Neil…
I’m sending positive, healing thoughts your way, Sophia. {{Hugs}}to both of you.
Thanks, all. I also should say that when I told Sophia that I was putting down a P.O. Box # rather than our home address because “of all the crazy people on the internet,” I wasn’t referring to most of you.
OK, that was dumb, but the line made Sophia laugh, and that’s the point.
I’m so sorry. Much love to Sophia.
You guys will get through this…and please know that there is someone in New York pulling for Sophia. Best wishes…
Most. Ha!
My thoughts are with you.
You’ll definitely be hearing from me soon, and meanwhile keep strong!
Hopefully, everything will be all right!
i’ll pray and sacrifice animals and send sophia my well wishes
Even here, you show wit! How is that possible. I believe they call it grace. You can negotiate with God later. Priceless. Has it occured to you that there is a pc. of god in all your weirdo internet friends? Maybe he’s working on the deal right now. There’s no place for suffering. No reason for it. I do wish Sophia paitence and faith. She is a strong and beautiful woman. She is strong enough to face this. If she needs help..you’ll help her. We’ll help her. One step at a time, my friend. I know it’s very scary..but it’s still one step at a time.
Refuah Sheleimah to Sofia.
Hope everything goes well.
sending all the best wishes for a successful surgery and speedy recovery!
Wishing the best of all possible for you, Sophia.
Seriously, yo. WTF???
I do sincerely hope things go smoothly.
Much love from the Millers. I love how you two take care of each other.
This is terrible news, I’m very sorry.
We will wrap her in a bubble of positive energy so that only good things can come to her. She will get past it all and be well. We’ll be thinking of you!
Neil, sending thoughts and good karma to Sophia. Just makes the little I do each year by supporting the Breast Cancer walk all that more important. No one should have to go through this once much less twice. Hang in there – you know you have lots of love out here to keep Sophia’s spirits up.
Sophia is in our thoughts and prayers
It’s so scary to not *know*. I just got past two weeks of “waiting for results” myself. It’s hell.
I’m going to pray every day that beautiful Sophia gets the same wonderful news I did: NORMAL.
SJ – Glad to hear that your results were good. Yes, the waiting is the worst part.
Two Roads — Thanks for walking in the Revlon Walk this weekend!
Sophia and I went to see “Rent” tonight. It was the first time for both of us. I’m not sure it was the ideal musical to see right now, but the music was surprisingly good. We both liked it. And it is good to be distracted.
Dear Sophia and Neilochka, sending you big hugs and love from across the sea. I know you will give each other the strength to get through this.
x
I’m sending so much love and support to you both right now xox
dear sophia,
we may never meet face to face… yet, I have come to know you via this blog.
In my humble opinion, the world REALLY needs you to be here!
I mean GEEZZZ… do you HONESTLY THINK you can leave Neil unsupervised!
Sending warm thoughts of peace and comfort to you both.