This week is the first anniversary of my father’s passing. When I started writing this blog, I didn’t expect my usual nonsense and sex jokes to be interrupted by a phone call asking Sophia and I to fly home to New York. I certainly didn’t expect to blog about the experience and receive so much comfort from bloggers. And I most definitely in a million years did not expect bloggers to help us decide what to write on my father’s stone! Thanks.
Hey, Dad.
Happy New Year. Shana Tova.
You always had a quirky sense of humor, but this takes the cake. When we all agreed, including my blogging friends, that “Be of Good Cheer” was ideal for the stone in the cemetery it was because that was your “tagline” whenever you said goodbye to someone on the phone. I figured you picked up that phrase from one of those old British war movies you loved to watch. Today, I did some research on Google, and guess what? You got the last laugh! The phrase was popularized by… Jesus! Of all people, this is who I’m writing about on Rosh Hashana?! Well, at least he was Jewish.
The idea of “good cheer” is derived from the Greek word tharsei, and the meaning of “cheer” is very different from what we associated today with that word. Tharsei meant “to dare to be bold,” “to take courage,” “to replace fear with hope.” The word tharsei is so old, it can even be seen in Homer’s Odyssey.
The phrase is also found in the Septuagint version of the Old Testament, as when Moses is at the Red Sea:
Two million people were trapped between the sea and the approaching Egyptian army. Escape was humanly impossible. In that moment of supreme crisis, Moses cried out to the people, “Fear not! Stand still and see the miracle of the Lord!” (Exod 14:13).
The idea of “cheering up” now had a slightly different meaning: “Take heart!”
Repeatedly through the Old Testament, God’s people were encouraged to take heart, based on who God is and what God would do. “Fear not, O Zion . . . the Lord your God is in your midst” (Zeph 3:16-17). “Take courage . . . I am with you . . . My Spirit is abiding in your midst; Do not fear!” (Hag 2:4-5).
In the New Testament, tharsei is constantly on the lips of Jesus.
A helpless paralytic heard Jesus say, “Take courage, My son, your sins are forgiven” (Matt 9:2). A hopeless woman was told by Jesus, “Daughter, take courage; your faith has made you well” (Matt 9:22). Blind Bartimaeus lived in utter despair until Jesus came to Jericho and they summoned the blind man, saying, “Take heart, arise! He is calling for you” (Mark 10: 49).
This is all fascinating stuff to me because it now makes more sense why you said “Be of Good Cheer.” I always thought it was odd that you used that phrase, mostly because I interpreted “good cheer” as meaning “go have a good time” or “live it up by drinking a lot of eggnog at the Christmas office party” You were always a conservative man and you were not the type to tell anyone to “live it up.” You were too much of worrywart for that. You worried a lot about everyone — mostly everyone except yourself.
Your “Be of Good Cheer” was not about fun, but about courage. As a practical man, you were telling people to be strong, despite the challenges they might meet. That sounds EXACTLY like something you would say! Be strong. Like Penelope warding off suitors as she waits for Odysseus’ return. Or the Israelites trusting Moses to walk into the Red Sea. Or a sick beggar trusting that Jesus will make him healthy.
In all these examples, those in need got “cheer” — “courage” — by knowing that something bigger than them was on their side, looking over their shoulder. You were saying something similar. You weren’t saying “Don’t Worry, Be Happy,” and putting all the responsibliity on them. You were saying, “Don’t Worry. If you ever need me, I’ll be there.”
And you were always there, for so many people.
I can certainly get courage knowing that you are looking over me and Mom. I will certainly have “good cheer” knowing you will always be around.
Even so, we miss you.
You can read all posts about my father here.
God be with you today and forever, Neil. You and your dad are in our thoughts.
thank you for this, neil. you took a phrase that most people could take as trite and made into a wonderful post. bravo.
it doubly resonated with me because the first anniversary of my father’s death was in june. you also did something that i did not have the courage to do, which is write about my father in public (and i have the shield of anonymity).
This just goes to show that even when they’re gone, those we love, they’re not really gone.
And that is very comforting.
*smile*
Courage be with you, Neil.
Happy New Year!
Great post, Neil.
reading this made my eyes threaten to leak. And not just because this was an eye-opening post either! cheers courage! *lynne*
Lovely post.
damn, man, did you have to start my day off by making me all weepy?
great post. way to keep your dad’s spirit all the more alive.
Really lovely post! Happy New Year and be of very good cheer!
What a beautiful post. I’m sure your dad would be proud of you and moved by your writing today and glad that you understood.
Or, if he was like my dad, he’d be rolling his eyes and say “about time you got it”.
Either way, beautiful and thank you for sharing with us. May God bless you and your family as your remember your dad.
I said a prayer for you.
I heart you.
Thank goodness I read this before I put on my mascara. You are such an incredible writer! I believe you might have passed on a little of your father to each and everyone of us today and I am sure that makes him proud of the man that you are. Be of good cheer! La shana tova.
“Be of Good Cheer”, what a wonderful sentiment at a difficult time for you and your family.
Blessings, Neil.
Have a wonderful holiday and may Neil and everyone else be inscribed this year in the Book of Life.
Thinking of you this week, Neil. Lovely post, and a beautiful tribute to the man your father was.
L’Shana Tova, my friend.
Have a sweet new year, Neil.
Happy New Year, Neil.
Great post. So moving and a perfect way to honor your dad. He sounds like such a fascinating guy that I’d like to read a whole book about him. Can you get on that right away?
L’shana tovah!
I’m sorry, Neil..I am sure this is a difficult day for you but I bet your dad would be pretty damn proud of his son…L’Shana Tovah… may the next year bring only joy..
Be well, Neil. Your dad sounds like a good memory to be having today.
I know he would proud of all the bed photos I got from hot women!
Happy New Year, Neil.
I lost my father 7 years ago and I still think of him often. Our loved ones are never very far from our thoughts even when they have left this world.
Peace be with you and your family at this time.
I really hope that somehow your dad is out there able to read your posts, esp this one. I think “be of good cheer” is just perfect. This may not matter as much to you but it will also be soothing and uplifting to those visiting their loved ones at that cemetary too. Cyber hugs being sent your way…
Beautiful/ moving post and he is probably looking down proud – it’s a great post to honor him. As one that lost his dad as well several years ago, I know how you feel and how difficult it is. Times like this is where love and family play a big part in keeping ones sanity. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
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You sure you’re not a biblical scholar or something? Very very interesting! Even thought my own Dad checked out over 15 years ago, I can still hear his booming laugh and see that wide smile – a happy man, who knew what life was all about. Be of good cheer!
I hope one day I inspire my children to eloquence like that Neil, beautifully beautifully written. E.
Shana Tova
God be with you, Neil. My husband lost his Dad around the same time as you did, except four years ago, so this is a reflective time for all of us here as well.
Shana Tova.
quite a beautiful tribute. I like thinking of Good Cheer as courage…
very touching. i’m sure it was a hard post to write, but you’ve done a wonderful job on it.
What an incredibly thoughtful post. It looks like your father did an excellent job raising you.
Happy Rosh Hashana.
Happy New Year.
Happy Day to remember your dad.
This was a really sweet story.
Hi Neil:
This is a lovely tribute to your father. I’m sure he is smiling right now.
I have a theory – very unscientific – that our deceased loved ones’ energy enters our hearts when they die. That way we have some of them in our cells, some of them that we didn’t have when they were alive. It makes sense to me. Here’s to a great new year to you.
to another good year of good cheer.
(i swear i wasn’t trying to rhyme)
I love how you still feel so close to your dad. I haven’t lost a parent, but this year I lost both grandparents, and it’s hard to convince myself that they are gone. I think about them all the time, and I know that won’t stop because they are gone. Thanks for the history lesson too. I love learning the meaning of words and phrases!
The letter to your father is sweeter than honey. I do believe this is how souls live on – they transpose into our souls and we perpetuate them. L’Shana Tovah…
Loved reading your post about your father.
I found your research surrounding your Dad’s tagline very interesting. A man that says “Be of Good Cheer” to his family & friends sounds like an incredible person. Treasure your memories with him.
Beautiful tribute, Neil, and beautiful sentiments.
I understand how you feel.
You did your father proud today. And every other day, I’m sure.
Oops, I pushed publish before I said L’Shana Tovah!
Here’s toasting you and another great post with apples and honey, and wishes for an amazing year, full of health, love, prosperity, and many blessings.
All the best in the New Year. Thank you for this tribute to your father, which gave all of us who didn’t know him a chance to share his life.
We seldom, if ever, exhort each other to be bold and courageous, to remember who stands with us. I’m glad blog comments are becoming a place to encourage each other, stand together, and share our beliefs.
Peace and blessings to you and yours.
what a wonderful post, neil. i love the way you talk about your dad. there is so much love in it.
xo
sizz
Thanks for sharing your Dad with us.
Well said, well said indeed. I truly love your posts when you explore your faith and the way it interacts with your life and that of your family. Does that make me lame? =)
what a titillative post. i’m going to go call my dad.
This was a great post, Neil. My dad is getting up there in age, and I know that day will come for me sooner rather than later. Thank you.
“Be of good cheer” – I like that.
Thinking of you and your family Neil.