Ummm… Like…

radio2.gif 

I thought my radio debut went pretty well.  The host laughed a couple of times.  But my Lethal Schlepin’ joke, so popular on line, fell flat because of my bad timing.  I was a little nervous, mostly because I had no idea what I was supposed to talk about.  Afterwards, my biggest criticism came from Sophia and it was less about the content, then it was about my speech.  She absolutely HATES when I go “ummm…like…,” thinking it’s just one notch above ape-language in the world of communication.  Combined with my fast-talking, Noo Yawk accent, I’m probably not going to get a career in radio anytime soon.

But I probably should work on that “ummm…like…” speech.  Any suggestions?  Maybe there’s some sort of “My Fair Lady”-type elocution class at UCLA? 

“The rain in spain falls mainly on Erica Kane.”

I woke up early to listen to the beginning of the online broadcast to get a sense of David Burd’s Washington Post Radio show.  4 AM in LA!  I broke out in a sweat when I heard him say, “Later we’re going to speak to Neil Kramer in LA about why he chose Mel Gibson as his Citizen of the Month.”

Huh?  I never said that!  Is he calling me thinking I am a supporter of Mel Gibson?  Of course, I immediately woke Sophia up, who was not very happy (we were at a wedding last night until late). 

“I need to come up with some line to explain why Mel Gibson is my Citizen of the Month!” I spouted.

Sophia threw the alarm clock at me, but, as always, came through at the last moment with a great opening line.

I tried to download the online broadcast, but I screwed up.  I only captured the first minute.  I wrote to the show to see if they can send me a copy of my spot.  Let’s see if they actually will…

You can hear that little piece of my interview about Mel Gibson here. (link)

All and all, I did pretty good, but I think I should stick to ummm… like… writing.

 

A Year Ago on Citizen of the MonthAnd the Winner is… Boules!

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67 Responses to Ummm… Like…

  1. anne says:

    They’d better send it to you – can’t wait to hear the rest of this.
    Great voice, Neil.

  2. I hope they send you the interview Neil! I’d love to hear the rest of it as well! :-)

    3T

  3. Hi Neil:
    I can’t wait to hear the rest! You are always funny in my book. Don’t feel like you’re alone in the “Um . . like” department. As an attorney, I’ve seen my speech transcribed by court clerks dozens of times and, despite my attempts to control it, my sentences are littered with “And uh,” and “um,” and “uuhhh.” You’re only human (not ape).

  4. Alison says:

    Doesn’t the station’s site have a link to the interview? (Going to check now. Will report back).

  5. Alison says:

    Okay, I guess not. Dang. But it was fun to hear the clip you were able to record! Love the Noo Yawk accent.

  6. Pearl says:

    Neil– um, like, um, can I have your autograph? Just kidding — you were FINE! I love your laugh.

  7. cruisin-mom says:

    Loved the Danny Glover joke…don’t worry about the um, like…some people actually get elected President of the United States speaking that way.

  8. deezee says:

    very illuminating to hear the voice behind the words…thanks for the glimpse…

  9. Nance says:

    I wouldn’t feel too terrible, Neil. The host himself leaned pretty heavily on a speech filler: “What’re ya doin?” Let us know when/where we can hear the rest. Bravo for the PR on your website and yourself!

  10. chantel says:

    I can’t wait for the rest of the interview, make sure you post it!!

  11. V-Grrrl says:

    When I lived near D.C., MIX 107.3 used to play a game called the “Uh” game. Listeners would call in, be given a topic, and have to talk about the topic for a minute or so without saying “Uh.” It seemed no one ever won at that. So next time forget 107.7 and go to 107.3 and talk to Jack. He’ll love every pause in the conversation.

  12. Neil:
    I’m always amused by how much TV and radio talk show hosts TALK instead of interviewing their guests. I would like to have heard more of you and less of Burd. I love the Danny Glover line, BTW!

  13. Miss Syl says:

    Huh. You sound entirely different than I’d imagined you would. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

  14. deannie says:

    I totally understood every word you said, your accent was no show stopper what so evah. I could tell you were a teensy bit nervous though (that is where the advice about slowing down comes in…you make yourself actually breathe just a hair more and that helps the words to come out more smoothly).

    All in all, very natural and I learned a thing or two as well. Good job! New to your site after your interview on the Blog Reader and loving everything I have read so far.

  15. Neil says:

    I think there’s a re-broadcast next Sunday at something like 4AM (?!), so if I don’t get anything back by this week, I’ll try to record it again. I got some software which enables you to record on-line radio, but I guess I should have read the instructions a little more carefully!

  16. My sister is a speech therapist and might be able to help you with the um-likes. I’ll ask her and get back to you.

  17. bookfraud says:

    i’ve taken lessons to develop a radio voice…ummm…uhhhh…all you have to do is say nothing. but you didn’t sound bad at all, neil. really. i’m dying to here the rest.

    when you said you had a n.y. accent, you weren’t kidding. i’ve only heard it pronounced “al-kay-der” in n.y. i love it.

    from where i originally hail, they say it “al-kaaaaay-duhh, bubbah.”

  18. Roberta says:

    You sound fine, especially after that buildup! If you were planning on doing a book tour with lots of radio interviews, sure, take a little class, get some tips. But you truly sounded okay; adorable, funny, and real.
    (I did radio for a while — I was a big fan of ‘uhh’ as filler. I deliberately chose it to avoid ‘umm’, figuring it was the lesser of two evils. Uhh… it wasn’t!)

  19. Non-Highlighted Heather says:

    I bet you do a spot on Alvy Singer impersonation.

  20. Brooke says:

    I love that they brought you on the show because they thought you named Mel the Citizen of the Month. Nothing like doing some research – such as actually reading your blog – before an interview.

    How long have you lived in California? Shouldn’t you have loosened up that New Yawk accent by now? After six months in Australia my mother couldn’t recognize my voice on the phone.

  21. momentary academic says:

    Your voice is FABULOUS!

  22. tamarika says:

    Great to hear the voice behind the writing. I understood you purrfectly. And, yes, the Danny Glover line was purrfection! Never mind about the “um … like.” It’s cultural and “in” for goodness sakes!

  23. Neil says:

    Thanks!

    But you should hear me say this tongue twister: “Sophia, let’s go to the mall and get a cup of coffee”

    which comes out Fran Drescher style as –

    “SophiER –Let’s go to the MAUL and get a cup of CAUFEE.”

  24. justrun says:

    Neil, you are cooler than I realized. I feel like I should send you a gift or something. Great job (from what I heard)- I hope we get to hear the rest.

  25. modigli says:

    Yo, like, not fuh nothin’, Neil, but I, like, love yuh Noo Yawk accent with a little, like, valley girl thrown in. Totally!

    Congrats on the radio spot! Hope I can hear the rest of it someday.

  26. Edgy Mama says:

    I’m a bad “ummmer” too!

    Congrats, Neil!

  27. Rach2 says:

    Great job, Neil! I keep reading people wanting to send you gifts, but you never mentioned that you got any. Did you? …or are these virtual gifts? ;)

  28. Rebecca says:

    You were great! You totally lived up to your rock star reputation. And I love the accent.

  29. Kristy says:

    The rain in Spain falls mainly on Erica Kane. I love that!

    Did you report on how your meeting went with Mel? I trust you both stayed away from the booze, right?

  30. tinapopo says:

    Oh my god, you’re my grandmother from Brooklyn, back from the dead. Hi, Nana.

    I can’t wait to hear the rest of it.

  31. Alexandra says:

    For those of us who are stuck in dial-up hell and can’t download your appearance, can you sum it up? Does it mean that people think you are an anti-semitic Jew unless they got the story corrected? If so, thats quite funny!

  32. liz elayne says:

    my husband and i are cracking up about the danny glover line…nice work.
    hope we get to hear the rest of it soon!

  33. Stefanie says:

    Wow, nice job. I think you’re uh, ummm famous? You must be getting so much poussay!

  34. Tara says:

    I even write “Um, like”. Plus, I haven’t lived in Chicago since 1979 and I still sometimes let slip that hard “A” as in “taaaavern”. I fear some aaaaccents just may be incurable.

  35. Karl says:

    God, radio people slay me. I love his line about how “the Middle East is blowing up before our very eyes.” Really? Is he reporting from the Middle East?

    You, though, you rocked.

  36. jenny says:

    Congrats on the press, Neil! But, yeah – what *is* up with you naming Mel Citizen of the Month? I’m outraged!

    You sounded awesome – very quick and witty!

  37. Danny says:

    Damn, I really want to hear the rest after that tantalizing morsel. You sounded great and you are so brave–I don’t think I could’ve done it. As for your New York accent, keep it–we wouldn’t want you any other way.

  38. Sandra says:

    Neil, are you going to keep talking to us now that you’re famous?

  39. WAIT! Sophia threw an alarm clock at you? So, UMM, you two are sleeping together again? Nice. How did I miss that?

  40. Sophia says:

    Femme, I have a big place.

  41. you sounded a bit nervous, but i could actually understand each and every word. did you notice your host was stumbling on his words as well, perhaps he was nervous interviewing you?

  42. Elisabeth says:

    I realized at 11:15 yesterday that I had missed it. Love the clip, hope you can get the rest. First time I have heard “Al Qaeda” pronounced “Al Kayder,” though. Cool accent, I had been wondering if it was slowly disappearing, and I’m relieve that it’s still well and alive, and living in L.A.

  43. Jules says:

    How did you not freak out – I would have been so nervous and you sounded really relaxed! Great job – nice to put a voice with the writing! I’m sure you’ll let us know when/if they replay the whole thing.

  44. I’d love to hear the rest. Am glad you’ve kept your NY accent. As for public speaking vs. writing, I think it’s true of many writers that our written words are a bit smoother than our spoken ones – only because we get to edit the writing and not the speaking. And as we’ve discussed before, all publicity is good publicity in LA!

  45. Sunny says:

    How ’bout Richard Levick as Citizen of the Month? He says, “In vino veritas, Mr. Gibson.”
    Levick’s Spin

  46. treespotter says:

    heeey!!! I warned you for that exactly!! Should’ve listend to me!

    that’s okay man, second one will be easier.

  47. Bre says:

    As long as you are able to keep the “uhms” and “likes” to under 60 per minute I think you’ll be ok!

    Sounds great!

  48. Dave Greten says:

    But I probably should work on that “ummm…like…” speech. Any suggestions?

    It’s like the first thing they teach you how to drop:
    http://www.toastmasters.org/

  49. Sarah says:

    I’m so bummed I missed hearing it live…I hope you get the whole thing for us to hear. What you managed to share here sounded great–you sound like 90% of my relatives, of course. My NY roots go deep.
    Congratulations, Neil!

  50. Congratulations!

    I say ummm too much as well. You just have to learn to think when you speak and not shut your brain down or let it go into autopilot. That usually keeps me from going into ummmm mode.

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